MK forum

Will you still love me
Will you still want me
When I'm
Four score and Ten?

That Ringo's a bell, or bowel.

Bemused

Very true. But why when a parent finds out that they had paedophiles coming into their home, that what their child has been saying for decades is now blatantly true and far far worse than they even foretold, is there no "are you o.k.?" or "sorry we didn't listen"? Just more verbal abuse and odd behaviour.
Sometimes the best form of defense is to attack and this is what has happened. But why try and defend the indefensible, when you've been preaching for decades that much lesser sin will incur the wrath of a Supreme Being that you claim to serve so adamently?
In my family, very little adds up and probably never will.

It's true, it doesn't add up...makes me wonder if that's what years of denial does sometimes, twisting and distorting everything out of place and ending up damaging relationships. I've talked to several different MK friends about their conversations with parents and their (the parents') responses range from the "I'm so sorry-how can I help you" to "That's just how things were back then, sorry that happened" to refusal to talk or process or admit that anything was/is wrong. Some have an ok relationship with their parents, but others' relationships are quite strained. It's hard to understand why each responds the way they do...

From my calculation about 50% of Kiwi MKs have no relationship with at least one of their parents.

I suspect my mother has very little idea of this scandal, her world is very filtered and has been for a very long time. She has few thoughts of her own.
I don't know if she was told what was really going on around her, that she would believe it or even understand it. It is probably not worth the trauma of popping the bubble she lives in, for it really is not her fault at all. She to got trapped in this web of deceit and the spider is in complete control, for the time being.

Wow, that's a grim number, 50%. That is very sad.

Sorry about your mom, and yeah, seems like it might just be best to leave that like it is...might cause her even more stress that wouldn't be worth it in the end...

Given the age of my mother, think you are wise. Better not to victimized another victim.

Few given the age of our parents will change anything. I keep thinking of Larry Norman's song "...nothing ever changes, everything remains the same we are what we are ..."

I do of one lady who in her 90's still kept up on everything and was willing to change. But we don't run into many. I hope I will be an old person who always tries to see things from another persons point of view. With our parents we have to decide if we need to tell them were we are or just go on with life without them knowing. If their response will hurt you you do not have to engage in discussions with them.