Bemused, you wrote "Imagine that abuse is like the result of a burn. Scar tissue forms, it is never as good as the original tissue, but it functions to some degree. That degree depends on treatment after the burn. Left untreated the scar will become tight and a contracture may well develop so that full function is inhibited. But unless one has access to a brilliant plastic surgeon the scar is for life. It can be covered up, by clothes and/or makeup, but it is always there to remind the recipient of one moment in time when something went horribly wrong. Is it worth the effort of showing to others the scars, so that another child is not burnt? Of course. Can the scar and its cause ever be forgotten? Not completely, but there can come an acceptance and then a desire to make the best of what life has dealt. It is no badge of honor, but in letting it be a symbol that there is a life after tragedy, is a step in the right direction and having the courage to allow the scars to prevent others from suffering the same fate is a noble act.
Between us we have accumulated many scars. Alas there are many others who have not been able to move on, or whose lives have stalled as a result of being burnt. And there are those who cannot make sense of their lives, because they were abused from such a young age they live in a strange world of knowing that something was horribly amiss, yet cannot pinpoint it, except for the unexplained fears, trepidations and unexplained reactions to seemingly normal life events."
Funny that you should use this image as a way to understand what 'we' have been thru. I have a scar. A physical scar. A foot long. On the back of my knee/leg. It is from the horrific accident that put me in hospital in 1986. It is a constant reminder to be of the 'rest of the story'. Being in hospital, getting medical help is supposed to be a good thing. I still feel mutilated. But, my scar also reminds me - D A I L Y - of the fact that I was raped while in hospital. It reminds me of what 'my doctor' did to me. It reminds me of the betrayal of those in authority who should have come to my help - who should have done something, anything.
MY scar tells me that I am not worth better treatment. MY scar tells me that I deserved what I got. I had it coming to me. My scar says loud and clear that ntm decides whether or not I get justice - and obviously I have not seen it yet. My scar says that ntm is more important than me, every time. My scar will not heal. My scar will not go away. My scar will continue to remind me day after day of the horrific treatment that I have suffered at the hands of ntm.
God is not dead. He did not give ntm the right to play god. Maybe now ntm - past and present - will have to wake up to the reality of what has been done - NOT only to me, but to so many others as well - and take the consequences. We all know that for every action there is a reaction, consequences.
Face the music ntm. Do it as a MAN. A woman would have dealt with this years ago!
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