MK forum

NEWSFLASH :

NTM announced today the awarding of three catergories of plaques, they are as follow:

For those who have committed let us say "indiscretions", there is the
Sin Madly And Repent Tomorrow (or SMART for short) Plaque.

For those retired in the NTM Hilton there is the
Old Folks At Retirement Time (or OFART for short) Plaque.

The last catergory is for those who left, under interesting circustances
Didn't Endorse Plan And Removed Therefore (or DEPART for short) Plaque.

I remember several years ago having a conversation with an NTM father who was having great difficulty relating with his oldest son. His son had been through some very tuff times in his young life and having knowledge of the situation, I knew the majority of the problem was the son crying out for a genuine relationship with is father, but he father was mostly detached. I asked him if he had ever considered the fact that NTM as a whole had missed it! I mean completely missed it on what it meant to serve God and how to raise kids in a biblical sense. He gave me the answer I was so used to hearing and so I told him what my point was. The point being that the MK landscape at that time, a good half decade ago, was litered with the bodies of ruined lives. Literally, everywhere I looked, MK friends of mine where living in a hell on earth situation. I asked this father if it had ever occured to him that he, and the whole of NTM needed to go back to the drawing board and reconsider...well everything!!! Mainly because what they had been doing for the last several decades wasn't working! Without missing a beat, he kept right on saying how he couldn't beleive his son was so messed up and how he could have gotten so far from God.

This is what scares me most about all of this. There really is a satanic side to how NTM has taught the Word of God all these years. It has produced a cultish atmosphere/mindset that renders intelligent people unable to distinguish right from wrong, nor can they distinguish where the root of a problem lies in the first place. Its almost a surreal example of the king that has no cloths. The problem of the fundamentalist, controlling, self-righteous mindset, (of which NTM is dyed in), is that it denies reality in the face of evidence to the contrary. The results of this cultic mindset is runined lives and this fact has been smacking NTM in the face forever, bringing even more havoc on untold lives of all ages, but ESPECIALLY children, and yet they carry on, acting EX CATHEDRA as if all the world is at fault while in their pompous, arrogant state, they blame the whole disfunction on rebellious children who have bad attitudes. Hog Wash!!! I declare that NTM has fostered hatred toward God by portraying God in a demonic light because of their extreme views on authority and control.

Will the real slim shady in NTM please stand up and point out the elephant in the room. The king has no clothes! NTM you messed up big time a very long time ago! Admit it and shut it down. The fields are not white for harvest, they are in fact strewn with the dead and dying bodies of those who should have been closest to you. Your self-righteous pride has blinded you. Trust me, there are WAY to many souls slaughtered at your self righteous alter so please tear it down! I have soo many MK friends that are suffering and/or dead and dying right now because of your legalistic spiritual pride. Those of you who are in leadership now have the opprotunity to do the only right thing left and shut this horror circus show down!

Ironman

Sounds like you've been talking to my father, although as I suspect this is not the case, there is some comfort in knowing that I'm not alone.

If one was to pick one missionary from NTM as being indicative of what NTM was like as a whole and my genetic predessessor came out of the hat, you would be exactly right. On that basis alone NTM should be shut down.
However if by good fortune out of the hat came one of the many tribal based missionaries I knew as a child, then the opposite would be true.
It's like the old saying, "A bad apple rises to the top". Those that desired to reach the top because of ulterior motives did so. Therefore (based on my experience), thieves worked in the supply department, paedophiles became dorm parents, brainwashers and child beaters became teachers. Each gravitated to their own agenda of power/corruptness, while the good sorts got on with their work and had their reputation ruined by those who didn't. Of course this is a gross generalisation, for there were many good dormparents, teachers and supply personel and the odd bad tribal missionary, but I think the point is a fair one.
This also probably explains why MKs had different experiences, despite being in the same place at more or less the same time. Who you had to interact with and your individual circumstances (i.e. being female in a dorm was a disadvantage), governed your experience and therefore your perception of your childhood.
Thanks for the post, it is very thought provoking.

Ironman and Bemused: BOTH of you make excellent points.

Yes indeed, there have always been some wonderful, Godly people serving faithfully within the NTM framework. Men and women of greatest integrity who left an eternal imprint on people they loved very much. I pray they will never be forgotten. Or ever FEEL forgotten.

There are also many MKs who had genuinely positive experiences growing up in NTM. Now as adults they are leading fulfilling and productive lives. For them, their MK experience has become part of the richness of their life fabric, and they are grateful for the added dimension their unique background gives them.

That being said, everything you posted, Ironman, is also worthy of serious consideration.

Very, very serious attention and consideration.

These are the kinds of issues NTM should be checking out in their Leader Review.
They should be collecting the reports of adult NTM missionaries whose reputations were ruined by THEM.
As well as those of MKs who had to grow up under these leaders.
They should be reading the articles on T. J. Addington's blog (Leading from the sandbox) to find out what good leadership looks like.
And inviting T .J. Addington to be part of their Leader Review.
As well as creating a truly safe place for these stories to be stored OUTSIDE of NTM.
It is truly amazing how fair GRACE was to both parties in their investigation and how the FACTS put so much blame on NTM.
And how blind NTM continues to be.
And how great they sound to supporters and churches.
Blah!
VERY serious and very sad.

http://leadingfromthesandbox.blogspot.com/

Check out the 2 articles he wrote in 9/2010 after the GRACE Report came out.
He has MANY excellent articles on leadership topics.
There is no excuse not to be learning in your weak areas, NTM.

@ Bemused/Raz, and everyone else

I do agree that there were some very good people in NTM, and I myself didn't suffer any of the horrors of physical or sexual abuse, but I can say with almost certainty that any MK that spent even a couple years growing up in the mission suffered spiritual abuse to varying degrees.

What I hate is the thought that I was a "lucky one", that somehow I "escaped" the ravages of the system. The thought that, for whatever reason, my parents didn't buy in whole sale to the mind controling legalism of NTM philosophy. That is no way to have to deal with your upbringing, especially in the context of ministry. Its stinks to thing at the same time that so many good friends, many of them from good families have suffered as a result of this twisted spiritual control. It takes a lifetime to shed these chains, and all of us as MK from NTM have had to shed chains of legalism to varying degrees. What made it all that more troubling was when the GRACE report came out and we all got a chance to peep behind the curtian,(the mayor of OZ turned out to be a fake), and that sickening sinking feeling set in that what we all had been thinking/seeing while growing up on the field was more of an isolated anomalea turned out to be wide spread and sanctioned from the top down. It became clear that the whole organism was virused and terminally ill.

I do have great memories of growing up on the mission field and I do not for one minute regret my experience as an MK, but good Lord, so much of the nonsense that happened could have been avoided and there seems to be no desire to take it all seriously by the current EC. Playing the legal system against wounded MKs is a sure sign of that.

On another note:
Sure wish Tow mater was still hangin round. We miss his insights

I think you make some excellent points. I agree, when it comes to "Spiritual Abuse", there would be few MKs that didn't fall victim to this, as you say the thinking was warped and it got passed down the line.
In PNG the Principal who imparted the spiritual wisdom, was to put it politely, crackers. So we were feed a diet of bizzare spiritual info, day in day out. And you are correct, he sanctioned some odd behaviour from others, because it suited his agenda in keeping tight control of the young minds put in his charge by trusting parents.
Therefore you end up with the likes of myself, who is skeptical of any organised religon and feels very uncomfortable in a church.
The scary thing is, that these same people are probably still pumping out the gospel of hate, thankfully there are a lot of deaf and daft ears in the resthomes. But what of the next generation, some of whom swallowed what they were taught hook line and sinker? Are they perpetuating the same myths, pedaling the same spiritual abuse that they endured, because they were taught not to think or question?
Many thanks for the debate, it is definitely thought provoking and this is what we were denied as MKs.

On a semi trivial note.

Given a best case scenario comes to pass and those offenders still alive are dealt with by the justice system and NTM is held accountable for its part in all this, what then?
Just curious what others dreams, hopes and plans are, if a successful resolution is reached.

Personally I'd like to go on a holiday, never know maybe even catch up with a few of the friends I've made on this journey. Might write another book, or might have a break from writing for a while. Definitely will spend more time riding the bike with the dog on the back.

Anyone else got any dreams, promise won't laugh .