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| Time to share my story https://fandaeagles.com/forums/viewtopic.php?f=5&t=550 |
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| Author: | 33OUCH [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 3:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Time to share my story |
I have hesitated to share my story, because it seems like nothing compared to what happened to others. But it is another piece of the NTM puzzle of wrongdoings. My family was on a field in the 90s, so far not mentioned here in these forums. At 16 I was touched inappropriately on a school camping trip by an adult male, "Uncle P". He said it was our little secret. I kept the secret for a while, then when I broke out in shingles b/c of the stress I told my dormparents. Shortl thereafter "P" & his family left. Within a year my own family left too - for many reasons. We basically never heard frodm NTM again: no follow up at all. Found out that "P" was allowed to return to the field a couple years later! I am so angry at the way this was NOT handled! I don't know what anyone was told as far as the reason for either family leaving, or why my family was ignored for the most part after that. Why was he allowed to return?! This is a very short account of my thoughts, limited space & internet access. But it feels good to even anonymously and briefly share what happened. I tried to talk to a former dorm sister about it recently to no avail. I hope that 2011 brings more open minds, and more positive actions from anyone who can make sense of this situation we are all a part of! |
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| Author: | Aghast [ Wed Dec 01, 2010 3:47 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
33ouch, thank you for sharing your story. The abuse that happened to you is just as serious as the other stories here. And I know how terrible it is to have the abuser still free to serve and in NTM no less, and no one being told about what really happened. That needs to change. The way it was handled is terrible. I would recommend writing to NTM (tibby_westcott@ntm.org) and to Grace about it. NTM will be re-investigating all of the abuse cases from the past and intend to handle them correctly this time around. I do know of another case very similar to yours from the 90s in PNG that I have been told will be looked into again. |
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| Author: | MK MINDA [ Fri Dec 03, 2010 8:29 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
SO glad you have joined the forums 33OUCH with your very important story! That should not have happened! This is another very upsetting story. |
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| Author: | 33OUCH [ Mon Dec 06, 2010 2:39 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
It continues to amaze me how even CURRENT New Tribers are a little uninformed about the GRACE report. I recently spoke with a couple who are current members of NTM and they said they thought "the whole Fanda thing had been blown out of proportion." What really shocked me is that they have this opinion, and yet when I asked them, they had not actually read the GRACE report! Once I spoke of a few of the details of the GRACE report, and asked them if they still thought the same way - they actually agreed that maybe they ought to look into all of this a little more closely before making a judgement call on the subject. It pains me how often people allow others to influence/make their decisions/opinions for them. |
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| Author: | Aghast [ Mon Dec 06, 2010 3:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
Where we work in NTM everyone has been encouraged to read the grace report and has been informed about the Fanda Eagles website. It has been openly discussed in several question and answer meetings. We have been encouraged to be educated about it and grieve for the MKs and acknowledge NTM's failure to the MKs. I'm very thankful I started reading the website as it has helped come to terms with things from my own life and I have a huge burden for my fellow MKs who have been hurt. But I continue to hear of people coming back from other fields who aren't aware and some aren't interested- I wish all of the fields would hear the same things we have heard from leadership here. |
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| Author: | ViaWings [ Wed Dec 08, 2010 7:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
33Ouch...i'm still amazed and humbled at the courage on this site. You have every right to be angry. What happened to you and how it was handled was not right. I'm glad you have told your story. Please stay active if you can. |
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| Author: | MK py [ Thu Dec 09, 2010 11:11 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
How could NTM make things right by 33ouch? Or all the other abuse victims? So far, NTM said they are sorry. Implied in this is that mks should then forgive NTM and move on. Now, this may or may not be entirely true but actions are reality, words are hollow if they do not match action. May I take the liberty of expressing what is the perception on many mks (on this site) on NTM's attitude towards them? NTM is sorry for what happed in the past and we are deeply sorry for your pain. We are in prayer constantly and meeting regularly to discuss what to do about all the new cases of abuse surfacing on the Fandaeagles website. We are deeply concerned but are lacking the needed personnell to do more than what is already being done. We are legally constrained to limit our communication with the abuse victims on advice from our legal counsel. Please don't take this to mean that we don't care, we do. Our hands are tied. If we as a Mission open discussions with mks, we may be forced to challenge the veracity of their accusations and this could lead to eruptions of accusation and mre hurt feelings. No, it is better for NTM to protect its members by shielding them from potential lawsuits (there could be dozens). If thi is not true NTM, my apologies. Untill you provide a correction, this is my percption of your curren position on the matter. Respectfully, mk py |
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| Author: | Kathy [ Thu Dec 09, 2010 12:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
MK py, I think you summed up the situation very well. Very sad. |
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| Author: | Raz [ Thu Dec 09, 2010 9:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
Yep, PY, that's how it's lookin' and feelin' to me too. NTM, Larry Brown, CPC, etc.... if we are wrong in our perception: SPEAK UP!!!! |
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| Author: | Gene Long [ Thu Dec 09, 2010 9:53 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Time to share my story |
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