MK forum

Dear Mr Allbetter,

We need to form the Neglected Husbands Support Group. Mrs Bemused, despite her many wonderful qualities, is not regularly acquainted with kitchen utensils, a vacuum cleaner or a washing machine. However being a New Age Liberated Modern Male, I gladly fulfil these roles, as well as tend her ailments, serve nutritious meals and take Canine Bemused for his daily exercise, with minimal complaining.

Humbly at service

Bemused

I'm very sure you would find a lot to talk about

Every now and again I wonder about some particular aspect of how things were run in NTM training colleges. I mean about the underlying psychology of how they ran things. Would be interested to know others thoughts on these random things.

1. Work detail. I am sure that they chose the things you hated and made you do it so God could teach you. But why? Why not choose the things you were good at? [You'll laugh at this Allbetter] but I was stuck in the kitchen for 1.5 terms. Not outside in the sunshine (of which there is much in Australia). I hated it! And then hated it some more. Other "ladies" would have given their right arm to swap with me. Alas. I don't believe I learnt anything other than to peel vegetables at a phenomenal speed.

2. Sharing time. I'm interested in the psychology of the whole leaving an empty pulpit up the front and then everyone sitting there while people get up to "share". Everyone would say they felt 'led' to share x,y,z. I waited to feel such leading and consequently shared not a lot. I was told in my review (can't remember the NTM word for it) that it has been noted that I never shared or if I did it was of a trivial nature. So, I used to sit there thinking furiously about what I could share. Shame on me to - for sometimes I made something up just so I had something to get up and say. I am ashamed of that now when I look back on it - ashamed that to fit in I was not true to myself and lied, essentially making stuff up....just to please them. I still kinda feel embarrassed about it now.

3. Work detail part B. There was a woman who suffered from mild asthma and really was not that well in general. You know, the pale and pasty type. They always had her painting - even the backs of kitchen cupboards and she often felt ill from the fumes. I got myself in a power of trouble once for swapping with her one afternoon. I was weeding and heard her crying she was feeling so crook. I thought it was logical to swap so she could be outside in the fresh air and I painting inside, not especially bothered by paint fumes. Alas no. But why? Why would you want someone to be doing something that made them unwell? How could that possibly work? Perhaps she was supposed to be learning submission.

4. Ratting on others. It was a bit like the Stasi at times. Leaders quite often shared with me that others had mentioned to them various things about me that they believed were not good things. I remember being told I laughed to readily and that I was often 5 minutes early to use the washing machine (I had the first run at 5.30am). Who would even care if someone was 5 minutes early at that time of the morning. Oh, oh and once I was told that my work detail shorts were too becoming. Apparently my longish and tanned legs were a distraction (wish they still were ). Gosh the shorts were almost to my knees! And then there was the time I was told to comb my hair more often to look more feminine. Oh lord I am still embarrassed by remembering this - I had to go visit one of the leaders wives and had some instruction on doing my hair nicely. All this had the effect of creating a level of paranoia. Perhaps that was the intent.

Looking back I think I had a lucky escape getting kicked out. On further reflection I think NTM had a lucky escape as well.

Anyone have any interesting ideas on some of the psychology behind all this? Or was it just an NTM Australia thing? When I get myself remembering some of the details it really does sound cult-ish doesn't it?

Please be seated as Bemused utters a word he seldom uses.

"Amen" to that!

It was designed to break you mentally, then you could be filled with whatever was being used to fill empty minds at the time.

Hence there are a lot of "yes" people in groups that use this technique. Easy way to test the theory is to give an answer or ask a question that is out of left field and then watch as the recipient squirms because they don't have a scripted answer.

It is a cult technique.

You had a very lucky escape.

You may now stand, Bemused has finished uttering his "Amen"

Work Detail---
Whatever you liked and were especially good at/ interested in
You could be sure you would NOT be doing.

Or how about putting someone on lawn mower repair because this person
Could do it and there was supposedly no one else.
But then assign mowing duty to those who knew beans about how to USE
A lawnmower and give no instruction on best practices (new favorite expression)
There were repairs to be done EVERYDAY!

So right. It was not an Australian thing only. That whole jacked up psychology was in UK (Bible College), Canada and USA as well. It is all part of the cult-like mentality.

Brainwashing. Training us for spiritual warfare.

I fell for all that crap as a seventeen year old starting the training. I wanted so badly to serve in Africa. So I jumped through hoops and performed.

My last decade of service I recognized the double standards, hypocrisy and male bigotry but was willing to continue to serve UNTIL I found out about the rampant abuse!!! First I learned about the Senegal incidents after I had left there and was serving in Brazil. I knew that was atrocious. Was thankful for GRACE and prayed ntm learned something from that all. Clueless that it was universal. I came home on short leave and heard all about the worldwide abuse of our MK's. Was depressed then for a few months realizing that the very institution I had so faithfully served was one of the biggest crime rings under the guise of religion. To this day I still struggle with some of the botched up psyche crap. So unbiblical the way the mission ran and runs.

Some excellent posts here about brainwashing in the cultish training camp.

I agree with it all and have nothing to add.

I experienced it too. Too bad for them, the technique didn't manage to cleanse me of all my brain matter. I kept asking questions through my entire 27 years as an adult member of NTM.