MK forum

It's a fact of life. Not a lot we can do about it.
For me to be reconciled to my father, the deal is that we never talk about the past and we sweep it all under the carpet. I stop posting on Fanda Eagles and I label other MKs as "weak individuals who did not get over their minor traumas". Suggesting sitting down and having a dialogue is like suggesting hand feeding a crocodile that is very hungry.
It is similar for others.

Given such a choice, which way would you go?

Exactly Bemused.

I found emerging from broken to be very helpful in my journey. She exposed a lot of lies we were taught.

Alas sometimes the only course of action is to walk away from ones family. If some of then have the courage to follow, well and good, but if it is dragging one down it may be the only option for ones own sanity.
It is like walking in the fog, then bursting into the sunlight and having to make the decision whether to go back into the fog again.

We now have intergenerational families where all the younger generations know is mission life. There are blood ties to other well established intergenerational families. The consequences of speaking out or questioning will be well known and the pressure to conform significant. Life in the fold will be comfortable, outside will be "the big unknown", with all the rumours of woe and dread.

But at the end of the day, it is oneself that one must live with, it's just a matter of on what terms one wants to do it.

"Pity the Crocodile"
I heard it said
"He's hungry and lonely
Just wants to be fed"

"And look at his smile
And tears so sincere
There is no reason
No reason to fear"

And as I looked
At the leathery grey scales
I saw in his eyes
The truth and the tales

So I declined
To feed the Croc
For I'd been there before
Lock, barrel and stock

I have not the faith
To see past the teeth
For past experience says
Feeding is the path to grief

Here's another crocodile song we used to sing as kids (not as good as yours bemused):
She sailed away on a bright and sunny day
on the back of a crocodile.
"You see," said she,
"He's as tame as he could be. I'll ride him down the Nile."
The croc winked his eye
as she waved a merry "bye"
wearing a happy smile...
By the end of the ride,
the lady was inside,
and the smile was on the crocodile.