MK forum

So very true, no amount of money will ever wind back the clock and let us start again or remove the nightmare.

We are not at the NTM table and because we dare to complain and upset "the work" we are unworthy to even receive the crumbs that fall. In the unlikely event that NTM suddenly has a change of heart, how on earth are they going to work out who get's what, who was abused more and which NTM entity is going to cover which MKs. i.e. are Canadian MKs going to be covered by NTM USA if their abuser was from say Arizona, or NTM USA pay for the damage done by an Abuser from Vancouver? Who would decide, IHART?

And what about the parents of the kids who were abused, there lives have been wrecked too, unless they are still stuck in the cult mentality and just accept in as collateral damage in the name of Jesus, hallelujah pass the Kool Aid?

You paint a very clear picture here, Deja do, of just how vast and comprehensive appropriate financial payments to victims of child abuse would need to be.

We know there are sexual abuse victims who have endured a lifetime of suffering because of what happened to them through the negligence of NTM. We know there are many victims of horrible beatings that, were they to happen on US soil in these days, would be a shocking crime that would merit prison time on the part of the offender. We know that hundreds (or thousands?) of MKs still live night and day with PTSD caused by being abandoned by their parents at a very young age, to be raised by underqualified or unqualified missionaries in remote boarding schools. We know that many missionary or former missionary parents feel they have lost their adult children because of the estrangement that has taken place within their family. Often the root cause of this estrangement is not comprehended, and parents do grieve over the "black sheep" in their family: many MKs are acting out their pain in ways that have been destructive to their health and their relationships.

How do you even begin to sort this tangle out? Who would be deserving of financial compensation by NTM? Yes, you are right when you say the suffering is spread throughout the world. Adult MKs now living outside the US are no less deserving of compensation than are people currently living in the USA. And some MKs were abused, not by Americans, but by missionaries from other countries. And the pain just widens, when you start to think about MKs who were molested or abused or raped by people of countries and cultures where their parents had taken them and failed to protect them from harm at the hands of nationals or tribal people.

Threewillows is right when she says no amount of money will ever remove the damage done to innocent children and adolescents in the many decades since the founding of this mission organization. I know that we all get this. But still, money can be a gesture of contrition, or it can help to validate the pain that a victim has long felt, or it can feel like a punitive measure, or a small bit of justice. There have been a handful of abuse survivors who have received some money from NTM, through the settling of lawsuits, or through the process of mediation. I have the impression that these pay-outs have been very modest, and the process to obtain the money has been long and arduous. NTM's attorneys have fought hard to keep the process as frustrating as possible, so these financial gains have not felt very satisfying or healing.

I do not expect NTM to ever freely offer financial compensation to the thousands of MK abuse victims all over the world who truly do deserve it. Whether they will ever be forced to pay more money to any victims who have not yet received any, only time will tell. But NTM will not offer it without a struggle. Many mission members think the mission has done more than its fair share by offering to pay for counselling costs. We should make it clear that even the reimbursement of therapy charges can be, and has been capped. There are abuse survivors who will need a lifetime of professional help. But NTM will not be providing that. Their generosity has its limits, believe me. And so they are now leaving the most needy survivors high and dry ... this is causing further re-injury, and the cycle of abandonment and lack of support can take a hurting adult MK all the way back to square one, in their futile efforts of escape the pain.

This feels like a very depressing post. I guess it boils down to my opinion that there are thousands of people who do deserve some sort of financial gesture of contrition on the part of the mission. And my opinion that the mission will never freely offer this. Any financial help will be hard-fought and meager.

And maybe some day the watching world will know this.

I just want to say that this has been a very good exchange of view points and I thank those who have taken the time to offer their insights.
I appreciate so much the freedom we have to be able to speak, so much of the world can't.
I give thanks that there are others who listen .
And I am eternally grateful that I am no longer guilty about using the word I, because there is some weirdo giving personal ministry about having a pride issue.

I have been on a long journey, I have fought a good hard fight and I have taken up the challenge.

I, I, I!

I add my agreement and support!

I too am so thankful to be away from that heavy, critical, "personal ministry" environment!

I am glad this is a place where I can share my thoughts and concerns with others!

I, I, I!!

Oh yes, I remember having to write assignments without using the word "I" because it signified an issue with pride. Pride was something that had to be knocked out of us and it was with great gusto.

And all that strange personal ministry, often about strange petty things. The worst part was there was often no right of reply, because the deliverer usually claimed they spoke on behalf of god. It usually started with "I don't want you to be offended, but . . . ." Which meant you were going to be crushed and then left, without being able to defend yourself.

Perhaps that is why Bemused writes so much, making up for the years of not being able to say anything

I, I, I!!!

OOO AND I FORGOT ABOUT THE I'S!

I, I, I, IIIIIIIIIII!!!

Thanks for a great post, Deja do!

I am very pleased that there has been more conversation here on Fanda Eagles lately!

More voices please!

Meanwhile, the number of hits on this site keeps rising!

5,947,795 at the moment!

6 million will be here soon!!

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/politic ... Zealanders

Dear President Obama,

Yes the Australians do talk to us, perhaps you should too.

We're just a bit busy helping NTM sort out it's mess at the moment, but when we finish, would you like us to help you . . . .

Cheers

The Kiwis