MK forum

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2pDGCZnU7w

This song, "Stronger Than Before", by Janny Grein, ministered to me in a very deep way back in 1993.

The quality of this video is not the best, but please take the time to listen to the words and music.

It always makes me cry.

Broken Angel, this is for you. And for all the rest of us who are broken, broken ...

Broken wings take time to mend ...

... on the breath of God I'll soar ... I'll be stronger than before.

Broken Angel, I also get attacks of panic and almost terror at times as the bonds that have held me for so long break and release me. I`ve ben in bondage for so long that the release feels terrifying sometimes. Those are the times that I have to remember that God says that He will never leave me or forsake me. Even when I really screw up God is still on my side.
I pray that God will continue to heal you and grant you peace. Keep up the good fight.

Thanks guys. I'm feeling a little more sane and a little less panic today. I wish sometimes that I could just blurt it all out, all the horrible truth, lies, whatever it it all is..... but I get this terrible sinking feeling that I've said too much already and am gonna pay for it. I'm not giving up.... just not sure why it's all gotta be such a battle. Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement. I have coma back to read it often.

As Winston Churchill said...we have nothing to fear but fear itself
Hey, Sherpa, I thought FDR said that? Maybe both of them
Great words of encouragement to Broken Angel. You've been there and understand--on the other hand, I've never been abused, but as I've read the heart breaking stories of the MK's, and have family members who have been used and abused, I can emphathize, listen and pray for each one.

Broken Angel,

You are on my heart as well and I am praying for you today, asking God to give you strength and grace for today!

Praying that God will grant you grace and peace and great healing Broken Angel.

Hi Broken Angel, I have been following the blog not too long, and have been broken hearted reading all the horrible things that have happened to you and many others. I was an MK growing up that was never sent to the boarding schools, (and may I add my parents were given much grief from the headquarters for it) however if I had it would have been during the late 80s and 90s. I have sufferred other issues and abuse in my later years and major depression issues and have had several suicide attempts as well. God has wonderfully healed me over the past few years and I think we may have a LOT in common. I encourage you to reach out and have a confidence in someone to talk with. It certainly helps to talk with someone that has suffered also. I have not to the extreme you have, but similar things. God is the healer, and if we seek him in the morning and in the evening (my new therapy) it very much helps. My depression I've learned to handle for the most part, I've cut as well but hide the marks. Please don't feel alone EVER, that was my worst fear for YEARS. Now I've learned to not feel that way with God by my side and me reminding myself of that all the time. I TRULY encourage you to not feel ashamed in any way shape or form. God holds every tear you have cried in your hands, he loves you and wants to heal you, after all he is the untimate Healer! I've learned to forgive myself, and I hope that perhaps at some point I may be able to be an ear for you.
I'll pray for you daily and keep you in my dearest thoughts.

Broken Angel I`m praying that God will give you peace, courage and endurance as you continue on your healing journey.

Thanks, rroym ... you always make us think. Your perspective is really helpful.

I've not understood the concept of healthy shame either. I can't see how shame is ever healthy, or that it would lead to healing and restoration.

Wow, rroym! I would like to flatter myself that I could put as much good theology into any post on purpose as you did on your last post on page 6 of this thread, quite possibly by accident!

Shame, guilt, sin, truth, responsibility, affirmation . . . these are important concepts, and when our understanding is, to borrow a phrase that Andy borrowed from the Bible, half-baked, it can be a huge barrier to overcome, something that can prevent healing, stymies growth and prolongs pain.

I think you've hit pay dirt. Raz and Sherpa Dude have already raised important points, points that really are not contradictory as much as complementary.

Your insights would not be out of place on the "Picky, picky, picky" thread, but they probably deserve a thread of their own. I hope you'll consider doing this. . . and save me doing it for you!