MK forum

Sad really. My parents never asked why I had no children and to hear my mother spouting her new found theory on marriage was insensitive. To be honest, I have friends on Fanda Eagles who know far more about me than my own parents and the reason is that my parents are not really interested. They are only interested in getting me back into their fold, nothing else is of relevance. Of course when the NTM sandal broke we finally went our separate ways, but we had well and truly drifted apart before that and I can't help but think it is because they don't see people as people, but potential converts. They just can't understand why people don't see the world as they do and much of the rest of the world wonders why they see the world the way they do.
It's a sad waste.

Bemused,
When you said that your parents weren't really interested in who you are? I felt that I could identify with that. I lived away from my family for many years and they insisted that I move closer to them. I finally caved in to their wishes, thinking they really cared. But not once did they try to understand why I had gone away in the first place or what type of life I had while there, who my friends were, what I had learned.....NONE of that. They just wanted me back in their fold as you say. Now that they have me, they still don't seem to care what is going on inside of me. They just have me where they want me....in their control. I admit, that I am choosing to be here by not moving, but it bothers me that they are happy while I am miserable. In the end, I am responsible for me being here, but the whole idea is sad. It would be nice one day to have them see and understand who I really am and respect me for that. I'm glad you have found your life, that you are happy, and that you have found your best friend to love and to be loved by. My day too will come, I hope. Did you hear that???? I just said "I HOPE", whoa, that's a start, right?

Funny old world. Here we are on this website, with some very basic things in common, yet we are probably very different because of geographical and other considerations. That's pretty cool.
My parents always said they were happy and no one else could know true happiness unless they came to accept their philosophy. This mantra was repeated over and over from a very young age. I'm not sure if my mother is truly happy, I think it is fair enough to say that she doesn't know anything else, except to be totally controlled by someone else. Perhaps there is security and therefore a degree of happiness in that. My father seems happiest when he is in control of others, but I've seen the other side of him when he can become very angry when he does not get his own way or someone is able to beat him with a common sense argument. That level of anger cannot be a symptom of true happiness.
Yes, I am truly fortunate to have found a more settled life, much of it due to being able to exorcise the demons of the past via writing and communicating with others on this excellent website. And I suspect you're heading down the same path too, which hoping to do so is a big step in the right direction. The path has ups and downs, but for me it has been well worth it and in my strange Sympathetic Agnostic way, I've somewhat become a missionary in my own right, spreading the good news that there are ways of truly living post the NTM experience.

Dear Iwillflyagain, Yes you made the decision to be where you are but that does not excuse your family not to care who you are and what you have become. I reckon this is your parents' loss. I sometimes wish all my children were around me but that is not to be but I am involved in their lives via telephone, internet, SKYPE and an aeroplane. During one of our long distances conversations my daughter was concerned about her son and we had a discussion as the best way to handle a situation and she made the statement it is so good to know someone else loves my children besides me. Love from family is so very important to our well being, MOO mind you. Full stop.

Thank you Pamela. I'm glad your children have a mom and a Grandma that love them like you do. It will make all the difference in the world, no matter how many physical miles lie between you. I now have very little physical space between me and mine, and it is the games they play emotionally that mess with my head. Coming up with the right solution is harder when your thinking is controlled like a puppet on strings. That's how I feel sometimes. Thank you so much for your encouragement....

It's what a cow does at one end. At the other end it POO. In the middle is hamBOOger.