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 Post subject: Messages With Humor
PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2013 12:55 pm 
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Joined: Fri Mar 08, 2013 7:18 pm
Posts: 11
To Grand Central Mission Leaders Worldwide:

Anytime a website becomes a little too serious, I always resort to humor. It always “triggers” my funny bone. Be advised – first warning – my name is Scatterbrained. I’m sorry if anyone is offended by my humor in this little anecdote. I don’t mind. Remember – I am the turtle on the fence post – no one can touch me. Nothing heals the heart like laughter. Some of this blog is serious, but a lot is just for laughs and to make my point in a humorous way. Please accept my words with this in mind. We soul mates need to laugh.

If I walk 7 miles, I have access to a bicycle that goes 10 mph, and after I have had a tuna sandwich, and my concussion-type headache goes away, and I sew up the hole in the seat of my only pair of pants, and I sell these cans, and I finish the six-pack under this bridge, if I find out one of my MK soul mates is getting abused, we will have a serious talk Sirs! Please don’t let any more MK’s become victims of child abuse by “religious zealots.” MK’s are my soul mates now. My dreams of becoming an airline pilot are gone now and I have taken myself out of the voting for the Pope. (These are the ramblings of Scatterbrained - these are not all my experiences nor are they meant to be taken literally. I am just trying to make some points about the condition of some of the MK's who bear the scars of abuse).

I made the mistake of using my EBT card at the 7/11. The child support enforcement agents will be after me soon since I owe them a lot of money. I’ll try to post every three months if they put me in jail. They tell me the hash is tasty and the mattresses are 1” thick for a good night’s sleep. This last package of Ramen noodle soup is going to taste good tonight. Tomorrow I’m going to have plump roasted rat – extra crispy. They taste like chicken.

My brain has been in catatonic shock and hyper-stressed due to the constant battering by angry people, my many mean bosses, back stabbers, and “religious zealots.” I have had a level 6 (1-10) headache 24 hours a day. My new Christian psychiatrist friend says I should have gotten help right after coming back from Brazil. I’ve got insomnia so I’m writing at 3:00 in the morning on extra-strength Charmin. One thing good about being “under the bridge” on Chilkoot (homeless shelter), I know now that a roll of wire and duct tape and a pair of pliers are very precious. If you can get into your Cadillac, I need some fresh eggs. Please tape the lid shut and put them next to the pigeon nest under the north side of the bridge.

This church I’m attending said that there would be no rapture, only a second coming so I’ve got at least 7 years more because the other church I attended is saying something different. I am confused. Will the earth be consumed by fire or what? Are they “religious zealots?” My life is so bizarre I’d like to laugh and cry at the same time. Send some Charmin and prune juice –stomach problems.

Dr. Shepard says I should have my heart checked. She said I’ve been living under stress for too long and this can cause a heart attack. My chest is tight and I feel panicky with a lot of anxiety. Dr. Shepard is like an angel.

I hope you haven’t forgotten about me and my soul mates -- the MK’s. They are helping me heal. My brain is starting to unlock now and they are encouraging me to continue the healing. Keep praying for us.

I know I sound a little angry, but I’m not. I have a great future with my soul mates from the mission field. I really want them to get the help they need and NEVER let this happen to any other kids again.

We are all survivors! Is that clear?!

NOTE: My Christianity Christian friends that I just met will be arriving in four hours. I have saved for three months for new shoes, but I think instead I’ll take them out for breakfast. I won’t let them pay. They are so kind! They have grace, compassion, forgiveness and lots of agape love. I need this!

I would like to live forever with this couple. This could be the “new beginnings” of a great future.

There are “heart people” and there are “brain people.” “Brain people” are not going to get this humorous story to make some points. If you get this – welcome to the club of “heart people.”

Sincerely,
Scatterbrained


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 Post subject: Re: Messages With Humor
PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2013 1:27 pm 
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Joined: Wed Nov 14, 2012 4:09 am
Posts: 354
I laughed and cried as I read this. <3


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 Post subject: Re: Messages With Humor
PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2013 6:01 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jun 23, 2010 11:27 pm
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I get it, Scatterbrained!

:D

We are so glad you're here! Please keep posting!


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 Post subject: Re: Messages With Humor
PostPosted: Sun Mar 31, 2013 12:05 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 25, 2010 7:04 pm
Posts: 3641
:D


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