MK forum

No Bemused they will not be knocking on our doors.

But I have memories many years old of time when I wouldn't have been knocking either. Of a time when I said "My kids will definitely go to boarding school it is the greatest place in the world". It took years of hearing rumors until finely at 32 I realized the dorm father was molesting my room mate nightly. Then I kept quiet for many more years thinking the rumors were just that and my room mate's experience a only experience. Then in my early 50s a fellow student asked "Did anything bad happen at Mamou?" We talked two hours of shared experiences of beating, sexual abuse, threats of hell. For years again I was silent except to write the info to the committee investigating Mamou. The reunion did I attend? No way run by the CMA just to get me again. Along came mkPLANET that I enjoyed to talk to MKs who understood TCKness. Great fun. Then one day I told my story there. I got a response from a dear MK who suffered the same at Fanda. Then they started the Fanda Eagles. Now I was talking about abuse learning how it effected my whole life. So that is when I would have found it wonderful to knock on your door and come for a visit. To talk about our background or horrors, to laugh at the humorous things in life, to enjoy your garden, to really live not exists. So Bemused don't give up as the years pass other will see. I just regret I didn't live but only existed for years. Now I live!

Good for you, Shary!
And there are so many with you doing the same now.
And the conference was SUCH an encouragement to so many.
HOPE!

Thanks, Shary. I am so glad you shared your story, with such honesty and vulnerability. Perhaps for all of us, enlightenment has come in stages. I know it has for me. My perspective clarifies and sharpens as time goes on. In my less cynical moments, I like to imagine that even some who seem to be opposed to us at this time may gradually have their own eyes opened as well ... and perhaps someday they will even get to a place where they can help us, rather than resist us.

I'm bitterly disappointed!!!!!!!!!!!

I fell off the wagon again, you know pissed as a newt for a few weeks, so I'm really disappointed in myself. And I'll be even more disappointed when the good horrorfied readers of this post that they love me and care for me, yet my inbox will still be empty. I don't want sympathy, or to be told I'm loved by strangers, it's to late for that, the people who should have loved me are either dead or hiding. So here I am a poor pathetic drunk and this is my last post before I go to rehab.

With the kindest of respects, please don't say you love me if you don't know me, prove you really care by telling everyone you know what a mess this whole thing is, before another child is raped, molested or tortured. Don't just leave it up to a crazy granny, a couple of poets and some Maumouites, tell the world that the abuse is still going on, show them Scott Kennel as proof.
I'm off into the caring hands of the rehab team, so I'll leave this mess in your hands.

P.s. Have a drink for me.

You will be in our hearts and our thoughts, Aussie.

Aussie's post hits so close to home, as only a couple of weeks ago our own precious daughter stood in our kitchen sobbing, "I am broken! Can't you see? I am broken! No one will ever love me!" I was grief stricken and simultaneously so angered. Wishing I could at that moment transport so many others into our kitchen to hear her words and watch her tormented face. People who do not want to see, hear or think about the totally DEVASTATING effects child abuse has on victims. Children who grow into adults who still feel broken, and unlovable.

I am so devastated ... for all our children ...

And ANGRY at those who caused this pain, deny this pain, cover up this pain, people who pay their lawyers to push these sobbing MKs into the corner of the room so the elephant can get more comfortable ...

I'm crying right now. With Aussie, with my daughter, and with so, so many others who struggle to get through just one more day without sinking under the waves into welcome oblivion.

Every. Stinkin'. Day. Hurts.

Ohhh MANNNNN! This surely does hurt. Like you said Raz, our hearts are with Aussie. I'm crying too. My heart is also with your daughter and your family Raz.