MK forum

I HATE it when people pull out "Judge not that ye be not judged" and wave it in someone else's face!

I'm pretty sure that's a directive to the individual reader to watch one's own attitude (the context of both the Matthew and Luke passages); it was NEVER meant to be used as a weapon to silence dissent or the airing of grievances/hurts or the asking of pointed questions.

Scripture also says "Prove all things; hold fast to that which is good" (I Thess 5:21) and "by their fruits you will know them" (Matthew 7:20) "are you not to judge those inside?" (I Corinthains 5:12) along with Jesus directive to call out those who sin against us (Luke 17:3), and if they won't repent, take it to the church (of which this forum is a part, like it or not, people) (Matthew 18:15-16 )and it's also in the law (Leviticus 19:17) to confront offenders!

So, anyone else want to cherry pick scripture and go at it with me? I should warn you, I left fundamentalism after years of study, so I am pretty knowledgeable about the whole counsel of God. I will call you out on taking things out of context.

Sunshine, I was thinking along the same lines as your most recent post in this thread. People who have been spiritually abused- emotionally, physically, verbally and/or sexually assualted in a religious environment by people who claim to represent God- are VERY wounded and extremely sensitive to the kind of shaming represented by the use of "Judge not lest ye be judged" as a weapon to silence them. This is why there is so little dissent in fundamentalist circles. Very quickly those unwilling to play along with the pipers in authority will experience scripture bashing. For many it is too painful to stick around and endure. Perhaps people left this forum for the same reason people leave the church- religious people (posters) care for more for their pretty institutions than they do the hearts of real people. Real people are told that in no uncertain terms pretty quickly.

In all caps even.

@shadowspring2

*standing and applauding loudly*

It is in part due to statements and beliefs as expressed by dbarney that I don't waste much time here any more. At least with Sherpa he was willing to fight for his beliefs and engaged you in the debate. Unfortunately i still read comments from those who support the abuser, NTM, with religious ferver. For some posters NTM is still equaited with GOD. Makes me sick so I dont post and read very little now.

I had a feeling that's what was going on.

Well I will take up for MKs and I won't back down for anyone. That includes you, Clark Kent.

I miss OT and Sherpa.

Things were too scary and unstable in my home life, being married to a PTSD, mysogynist-raised adult child of fundamentalism (MK and PK!) for me to post for a few months there, but now things are better. Secular counseling and a willingness to let go of fundamentalism on my husband's part is working wonders in his own recovery.

And on my part, going back to school to become self-supporting in case change was not forth-coming AND lasting, have also kept me busy.

But I am back, and I'm not backing down.

I put the world on notice, no NTM fundie apologist can shame me. I know the Lord. He is far greater than your religion, and any attempts on anyone's part to shame me will end in failure. It just won't stick to me. Unlike the MKs, I wasn't conditioned for years and years to take that sort of spiritual abuse.

My heart breaks for my husband when I hear of all the crap he has been through. I ache for him and the concept of God with which fundamentalists saddled him: a judgmental perfectionist who is easily upset emotionally and vindictive about it when it happens. How sad.

When I first heard my husband's parents were missionaries, I thought it would be so awesome to know people who also knew God! Surely their lives were also touched by the amazing love of Jesus, so much so they spent every day sharing that love with everyone. I assumed that having reached so many hearts with this love locally, they had spread out to other lands and cultures because they just could not contain the good news that God loved us all so much!!

Wrong. Boy was I ever wrong. Not even close.

The saddest thing of all is when people have been abandoned, manipulated and abused in the name of God, because then who can they turn to for healing? The God who decreed all this crap in the first place? Wt...?

Great points. I totally agree.

Also, as individuals we are always lectured to uphold the law of the land, and "God has ordained" these authorities, and (I have been told) obeying or disobeying civil law is the same as obeying or disobeying God himself.

So is there one rule for the layperson and some sort of exception I don't know about for Christian workers? I have read the Bible through I don't know how many times, and I don't recall any exception for Christian workers.

Shadowspring, thanks for the update on how things are going in your home. I am so thankful to hear things are looking and feeling much better. I was worried about you a few months back!
Each of us is on such an individualized journey of faith and trust. We all keep learning new things, and I think it's amazing how this website has brought us together to be a support and encouragement to each other as we witness each other's struggles and growth!
Hugs to you!

Thanks for the good wishes, Raz.

Therapy is working wonders for my husband these days, but the jury is still out. From all I have read, it will be a lifelong struggle against the misogynist/abusive ways he was socialized as a child.

I have a print-off from http://www.youarenotcrazy.com/ entitled STEPS OF ACCEPTING RESPONSIBILITY FROM ABUSE that I read every day, and I recommend he read every day. Plus I am continuing to take steps to to become financially self-sufficient.

Step #7 is Accept That Overcoming Abusiveness is Likely to be a Lifelong Process

If he continues to work towards healing and love every day for the rest of his life, that's how long our marriage will last. If he fails in that, that will really be a shame. I know for a fact no one else has ever loved and supported him in his entire life like I have steadfastly done for twenty-three years. Certainly not his family of origin!

They are only interested in his religious performance, and are quite content to just evaluate that once or twice a year. Oh, that would be his parents. His siblings are even less interested.

But they can all sing a great round of "and they'll know we are christians by our love, by our love..."

Of course by "love" they mean "doctrine" so once you figure that out you can see how the song makes sense to them.