How To Count to 10, NTM Style (with comments by Bemused)
One: There is One True God... (That's fine, Muslims and Jews agree too)
Two: There are two genders in this world, men to lead, women to do what they are told. (No, no, we are different genders, but equal, Bemused is a feminist!)
Three: Is the number of man, sinful creature that needs to be saved. (No comment)
Four: Is the number of the Trinity: Father, Son, NTM and another one. (Even Bemused's theology knows that ain't right)
Five: God planted five seeds. That's how NTM began. (Yes, I've read the book)
Six: Is the number of Continents: Asia, Africa, Antarctica, North America, South America and Europe. (No, there are Seven Continents! Australasia did not change it's name to "Crossviewasia" and disappear)
Seven: There are seven deadly sins, none have been committed by anyone in NTM, but some former members long ago, might have made a few mistakes. (Oh dear, reality check time)
Eight: The number of times that MKs need to forgive and forget the seven deadly sins that no one has committed. (Oh dear, you can't ask for forgiveness without repentance, it doesn't work that way)
Nine: The number of decades since NTM was formed. (Ummm, the maths department at Sanford came up with this one no doubt, it's the 1940s to 2010s or 70 years at the most)
Ten: For the ten disciples, Judas was dropped and Peter too, because he became a Catholic.
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