MK forum

Hi pngmk.

I know that if IHART had focused on just one school first and gone through the whole process with them to demonstrate how things were going to go, there would have been complaints from others who were still waiting their turn. I do realize that. However, I still feel that that frustration for those who were waiting would be comparatively less that the frustration we are ALL feeling now.

As I understand Pat Hendrix's work, she has searched for, contacted and vetted many people, groups of people, or investigation companies to come up with three different groups of investigators who are now engaged in varying stages of investigating Vianopolis, Panama, and Tambo. For at least some of these investigators, interviewing NTM MKs and compiling data is not even their primary job. They are doing this work as they can fit it in, on weekends, during vacation time, etc.

The broad scope of this has diluted the "punch" of this operation, in my opinion. If Pat could have found a group of 3-5 people with experience, who would have been able to concentrate all their efforts on getting as much information as possible, interview as many people as possible within a short period of time, get on with the process, strike while the iron is hot ... it seems to me that we could have been to the finish line by now, for one school. It wouldn't have even mattered which school. Starting with Vianopolis would have been fine. One year should have been enough time to get this done, if it would have been a focused and concentrated effort.

That way the rest of us watching and waiting could have been encouraged to see that we really were going to be listened to, taken seriously, and that those who abused and covered up were going to be exposed and suffer significant consequences. People like radioshack who have stories to tell would have been emboldened to speak out ... because they could see that it was actually going to mean something.

As far as Pat's sincerity and compassion for the abused: it's not that I disbelieve it, exactly. Personally I find I just haven't connected with her. I think we have very, very different personalities. I truly am baffled by her detachment. I don't know. I would think that anyone who cares about abused MKs would be staying up late at night keeping up with all the posts on this blog, trying to feel the heartbeat of those crying out for validation and justice.

But then ... I am also baffled by the fact that almost no one I know personally in NTM, formerly in NTM, outside of NTM, even my own family ... almost NO ONE I know ever comes on this site at all. I truly don't get that. It makes me feel very alone.

Okay ... I laid it all out there, pngmk. Don't know if it makes sense or not. This has been a very long and weary road for me. I'm not sure I ever make sense anymore.

But there it is.

Good morning PNG MK. You are by all means welcome here as an exchange of thought is what keeps us on our toes. You are right in what you say about having no idea about the destruction abuse can have on a persons life. You are obviously male which makes it even more difficult to comprehend. Am I angry? yes..you bet..bitter no.....bitterness grows when you sit and dwell on lifes wrongs...I left Goroka behind and got on with life the best I could. My anger is representative of finding out I wasn't the only non-American abused by Jim Given before "leadership" paved the way to Africa for him...knowing of his abuse of girls and nationals. After putting our family through hell....that and countless other acts of negligence and abuse against non-Americans...what an amazing game of join the dots myself and other past Numonohi MK's have played these last months.

In relation to not giving my story to NTM.....as I have said it's not going to put Jim Given in prison....and pages of recommendations from an investigation are just that.....RECOMMENDATIONS. NTM has shown their inability to put the recommendations of the GRACE report into practice so how much more likely are they to put IHARTS Recommendation into practice? There is also a huge amount of fear in providing your story to NTM as in the past they have not held these stories with the confidential respect they deserved.
For the last 30+ years everyones stories have been shoved in a file at NTM to collect dust and to be shared amongst the "inner circle" at the top.

Yes...NTM is attempting to right the wrongs of those who committed them in the past but up until very recently NTM was still attempting to bury the truth and anyone who attempted to question their accountability in the countless cover-ups.

Emotions aside PNGMK would you be keen to share your history with NTM of abuse after such a track record?.

I imagine you were in nappies when I was a child a Numonohi.....perhaps a child from the "inner circle"....it
must have threatened the memories you have held dear of your life in PNG terribly to find out such horrific realities existed there.

Maybe I will give NTM my history..but tell me PNGMK...what will it achieve in the practical sense?

Hey raz-
I think your perspective on how to the handle the investigation is very interesting- seriously. Perhaps that would have been a better and more efficient way to go about it.
I can't comment on pats "detachment" as i have I've never spoken to her, but I truly hope that someone who has dedicated her life to counseling and speaking out for the abused would be more involved and dedicated than she appears to you.
I can't say that I've ever talked with any other mks about this site other than my siblings. I think the majority of mks I know tend to converse about either the good times or their lives now. I'm sorry mks disinterest makes you feel alone. I can't even imagine your pain.

Hey bemused -
Your NTM past sounds dreadful. Can't you go the authorities about your abusers yourself?
I take my childhood for granted - even more than that though- I take my life for granted. No kids here though- perhaps a bit of mental illness... I'll ask my partner!
I think the reason that more people don't come on this site (raz) is for the reasons that bemused lays out. A place to lay out fear, frustration, and anger- something that I really don't think the majority of mks from my generation still hold on to. --- I could be 100 percent wrong on that though.

Hey RadioShack -
What do you hope will happen in the end? What is the ideal end result for you specifically? One of the reasons I ask is because I think that result for you may be contingent on letting your story be heard- that would be the practicality of speaking out.
I don't know what that inner circle consisted of - I was very very very popular though (I'm actually kidding here)
My memories aren't threatened by anyone else's experiences-just in the same way that your memories won't be made better by knowing that people had a great childhood as you suffered. Your NTM is 100 percent foreign to mine.


I am not someone who fits into the mold of a perfect mk- my childhood was far from perfect as I was a kid who struggled with many demons and a great amount of self-hatred. I know our experiences are vastly different as well as polar opposite perspectives. I'm trying to understand my fellow mks here.

Happy mothers day all!

Your NTM is 100 percent foreign to mine.

I am not someone who fits into the mold of a perfect mk- my childhood was far from perfect as I was a kid who struggled with many demons and a great amount of self-hatred. I know our experiences are vastly different as well as polar opposite perspectives. I'm trying to understand my fellow mks here.


Big ups to you PNGMK......yes...your PNG NTM is so foreign to mine...but thanks for acknowledging that and trying to understand fellow PNG MK's who knew such a different life below the well known veneer.

I know what I would be hoping to gain by telling my story and it is not just for myself but many others.

Cheers

Hey bemused-

I understand you don't speak for everyone who has been abused - but what is the hope directed towards? Hope that every abuser gets put in jail? Hope that NTM finds every abuser and publicly announces their crimes?

Closure is such a tv word - it doesnt exist. I understand that, but what would be the closure for the abused? NTM administrators want abusers in jail - but if that can't happen, what then? Will abusers settle for paid therapy and public acknowledgement of the crimes? I say settle deliberately because I know that nothing less than a lifetime behind bars is worthy for the abusers.