MK forum

Time for a laugh, so here goes:

Having a bit of time on my hands, I was having a nosey round the web and found the NTM Retirement Homes site.
And what do I see, (apart from some retired missionaries), yes, in bold print "Royal Volunteers".
"What old boy" I said to myself in my most appalling British accent (my parents are British, so I vaguely can speak it). "What have we here then". This can only mean one of three things:

1) Florida has split from the U.S. and gone back to being a colony of Mother England (so much for the Boston teaparty). So now all Floridians are subjects of Her Majesty Queen Liz II, making anyone who volunteers to work in said Resthome, a Royal Volunteer.

2) The Queen and His Royal Highness Prince Philip secretly joined NTM years ago and are now living at the NTM Retirement Complex. Well all those Royal weddings and appearances were a phenomenal cover up weren't they! What a coup for NTM, to have the Queen as a missionary and they kept it so quiet, amazing. Therefore anyone attending to her needs would be of course a Royal Volunteer.

3) The only volunteers allowed to work in the NTM resthome complex are in fact from Commonwealth countries, i.e. the U.K., N.Z., Australia and Canada, because they are the only ones who can legitmately call themselves Royal Volunteers. Those volunteers who don't have a monarch as head of state, would have to call themselves Republic Volunteers (sorry to any Democrats) and there was no mention of them.

I await to be enlightened, on which of these three possibilites is the answer.

Confused Bemused

P.s. in case anyone is wondering, personally I think the whole Royal thing is a waste of taxpayers money. Next time you have a Boston Teaparty, invite me along.

I'll go with the thought that only those from the Commonwealth Countries are volunteers at the rest home as they are "lesser beings". Probably used your stolen money to fund the building of the retirement home and now they want you to also care for them for free. That's so like NTM.
Are they managing to suck the good people from the Commonwealth Countries into
doing their dirty work for them by calling them "Royal Volunteers" now?. NTM as per usual "sugar coating" the/their dirty work.

You would need more than some heavy duty sugar coating to work with some of those residents.....I'd be wanting a body guard and a taser gun for a start.

Ha, ha, Should I send the Resthome the bill for all the money I never got paid? All that work I did for people and at the end of the job, the story was always the same, we ran out of money, sorry can't pay you or even better, we gave another kid your money.
Let's see, I reckon I was short changed about say 600kina, which was about 800NZD. Add in 30 years of interest, that comes to $20,000 NZD or about $16,400 USD.
Then there's the matter of the house, which I doubt was paid out at a proper price, so lets say that is $10,000 kina or $12,000 NZD, add in 25 years of interest brings it to $241,000 NZD or $200,000 USD.
So grand total of $216,400 USD. I don't take checque, or visa, just cash. Now whats the name of the matron that I send the bill to?



And Pigs might fly

I wanna be a "Royal Volunteer"
A nurse I wanna be
Giving out the laxatives
And enemas for free

I wanna serve in mysterious ways
Wonders to perform
And write what does come to pass
Upon my little form

Ya gotta be in health care to laugh out loud at that one!

Imagine the looks on the faces
When they find out who is the nurse
Not some blonde bombshell
But one who writes in verse

Not some curvey devine creature
But Bald, Bad Bemused
And when it comes to enemas
He will not be refused