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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 4:22 pm 
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Joined: Sun Apr 30, 2017 6:52 pm
Posts: 4
"NTM/Ethnos360 provides appropriate channels for you to voice your concern." WHAT. Has he ever TRIED to voice concern? And to who? The current child protection dept is not even qualified! The qualified people got fed up being dismissed and moved on to where their work would be appreciated. When I was in training and I asked about it, I noted that I always received different answers than the MKs got. After I left, all l I got when I tried to ask questions was a huge load of legal speak that intentionally made their "solutions" very vague. If I hadn't done my research first, I would have understood their spins to be positive, but since I already knew what was going on, I understood why they wouldn't be specific with me. Like in the message from the rep, he said, "Personnel decisions were made." Yeah, and they were not ethical, but bravo! You made vague decisions.

The frustration I have about this is that they should be updating their supporters in honesty. These updates could be posted on their Facebook page if they were trying to do things differently than the past, which was all cover-ups. You're right, they're just proving the point. Not transparent at all.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 4:31 pm 
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Joined: Mon May 01, 2017 3:34 pm
Posts: 13
Bemused, I am so sorry for all you have endured both in NTM, and since leaving. While the individuals who lived within the walls of the organization may be unable to see the necessity of transparency and repentance; those of us on the outside are able to see clearly. I'm not done talking about all that you have endured. Pray that an honest wave of questioning comes forth from NTM ETHNOS 360, on behalf of all MKS and in support of Fanda Eagles. Supporters we are the only ones who can carry leverage at this current time. If you are reading this please investigate the facts for yourself.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Thu May 04, 2017 6:06 pm 
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Joined: Sun Oct 02, 2011 1:14 am
Posts: 5218
Stacinator wrote:
Bemused, I am so sorry for all you have endured both in NTM, and since leaving. While the individuals who lived within the walls of the organization may be unable to see the necessity of transparency and repentance; those of us on the outside are able to see clearly. I'm not done talking about all that you have endured. Pray that an honest wave of questioning comes forth from NTM ETHNOS 360, on behalf of all MKS and in support of Fanda Eagles. Supporters we are the only ones who can carry leverage at this current time. If you are reading this please investigate the facts for yourself.


Hmmmm, me thinks those within the walls don't want to see. Life is to comfortable in the Cult, so why bother upsetting the apple cart by having any compassion for those who got turned into cider by the wheels of the apple cart.

There are some good people in NTM, it would be wrong to lump all into the same basket. Some honestly believe they can make changes from within and some have tried and found banging ones head against a brick wall hurts a bit to much, which is how this thread started.

For me it was a nightmare of a childhood, for several reasons. But I'm 53 and have the support of a wonderful partner and great friends where we reside and for that I am truly grateful. Family life was so strange, that I can now look back and see the comical side of it and I'm safe and well away from that era.

As for NTM, I think the only way to bring it to its repentant knees is to shut off the money supply. This is in the hands of it's supporters and those who are able to take legal action for the crimes they have suffered. I am in neither camp.

NTM could have been a great mission, helping many people. Even an Agnostic like myself has figured out that if God exists, He is not amused with the path taken. So much damage, so much cover up, so much arrogance.

NTM or no NTM, life goes on.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Fri May 05, 2017 9:20 am 
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Joined: Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:56 am
Posts: 165
D & A wrote:

What surprised me the most (and probably shouldn't have) was that when we left, I can count on one hand the number of members who asked us for more information. We were clear that we left because of NTM's response to abuse, but we didn't give all of the details.

Although we were in NTM for 20 years, our departure experience closely parallels yours. The concerns, the specific questions to leadership, the evasiveness and finally the blunt replies. And the response of other NTM'ers toward us also mirrored your responses. I publicly told my co-workers that it was because of the abuse issues, and didn't give details -- BUT I very specifically gave my co-workers an invitation to ask questions.

And ... no response. No response from co-workers, no response from leaders at my location, no contact from Member Care, and no questions even from a close friend on the Executive Board. In 2 years, NO ONE has asked. And I don't expect them to.

Over the past couple years I've given this a lot of thought and have tried to initiate conversations with friends still in NTM. (Bear in mind that I am not an MK; I entered NTM at age 30 and held real jobs before that. I am comfortable with life outside NTM, and because of that I think I have been able to ponder this issue from a relatively "outside" perspective and with a clear mind. Bemused might argue the 'clear mind' aspect. ;) ) Here are my conclusions: NTM is an exclusive culture, and when you leave those who remain don't really know how to process that concept. For most NTM'ers people outside NTM are (consciously or subconsiously) typically placed in one of three categories: Tribal people, potential missionary candidates, and potential supporters. You no longer fit their classic paradigm. That being said, you need to move beyond thinking that you matter as an individual now that you've left NTM. It will be hard, especially as MK's, because your life has been totally NTM, but accept that fact. And accept the identity that matters -- Child of God, not missionary.

You joined NTM to serve God and HE has moved you on. Certainly the circumstances that He used to move you were difficult, but accept that HE is the one who has moved you. And in His eyes, you were no more important or of any greater eternal value as missionaries than you are now. Regardless of what you do now for income, your focus is still His glory. You might remember the NTM phrase, "Missions is God's heartbeat." I got in hot water for contradicting that in NTBI chapel, but I still believe that God's true heartbeat is YOUR relationship with him -- nothing else. When the position of 'missionary' becomes the identity of the individual, then abuse of some type naturally follows and is, indeed, predictable. It is true that Christ-led "Missions" is one aspect of God's plan for bring people into relationship with Himself, but it is actually as very small part, when you consider the majority of believers simply 'live' and share their Savior in the process of daily life.

So live.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Sat May 06, 2017 6:36 am 
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Joined: Mon Oct 11, 2010 8:46 am
Posts: 11
Thank you all for what you have shared here. And Paul, what you said about Gods heartbeat- right on! Just that statement encouraged me so much this morning.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Mon May 08, 2017 6:33 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 25, 2010 7:04 pm
Posts: 3640
Thank you, Paul, it is all true--well said!
Not being MKs, but in ntm for more than 30 yrs, yes, our identity was "missionary."
It was hard to shake it all.
But we are so thankful God moved us on.
The freedom to be who we are and still serve God in an extraordinary way was a breath of fresh air.
We can identify with the concept of a full time ministry and a part time job of communicating with ntm.
Very hard to maintain focus because of their abuse to ntm adults.
Although we learned a lot from our training and from our service in ntm, we paid dearly for it.
But we are healed and productive outside of ntm and experiencing some of the best years ever.


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 Post subject: Re: Why we left NTM.
PostPosted: Mon May 08, 2017 6:34 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jun 25, 2010 7:04 pm
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We are, indeed, living!


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