MK forum

Dear Triber,

Welcome to Fanda Eagles, I am glad you are reading this, apparently you are not alone.

Please do not feel guilty that you are, this is a site for all those who are have been affected by the issue of Child Abuse. We are here to help each other through the minefield that this issue is.

Perhaps you have even become a member, but haven't found the words to say yet. That is fine, sometimes the first words to say are the hardest.

Perhaps you think that your story is of little consequence and that you will only be a distraction. Many of us feel that way, but we all have a story to tell and a point of view to share.

Perhaps you think that you will be eaten alive by "bitter" victims. Alas we are not perfect, the hurt often runs deep and so do the emotions, but bitterness is not the same as hurt. Bitterness comes from internalizing emotions, this is a site for expressing oneself and finding healing through expression.

Perhaps you want to leave NTM, because your heart is not in it any more, but you feel you can't, maybe because your spouse is not of the same opinion. This must be incredibly hard and it is understandable that you are in great turmoil, perhaps it might be easier if you PM one of us, please feel free to do so. Or under the cloak of a pseudonym you could ask for prayer, compassion and wisdom. Most of us pray.

Perhaps you fear retribution, isolation and/or denigration if you are seen to be reading or participating on Fanda Eagles. Let your conscience be your guide and act as if you have the weight of future generations of MKs upon your shoulders. Be brave and be who you truly are, not a copy of someone that you are told to be.

Perhaps you feel all alone and you just don't have the courage yet to face the loneliness and reach out to others. Again be brave.

Perhaps you are even questioning your own faith and how any of this could ever have happened. You are not alone on that one.

Perhaps you believe in your work and that you can sincerely make a difference to the lives of others and have no other way of fulfilling your ministry than through NTM. No problem, be at peace with yourself, but also be the person who steps up to change the lightbulb and who is not afraid to ask why the lightbulb is flickering so badly.

Or perhaps you've stumbled on this site in a google search and are reading and shaking your head, asking how and why. You are not alone, many of us ask that every day of our lives, some of us implore God Himself for an answer on that one. Feel free to join the search for the answer.

For whatever reason you are reading this and other posts, please be assured that we are here because this scandal has touched our lives and if as you read it rocks your world too, then perhaps there is some comfort in knowing that We Are Here.

Thanks for a great post, Bemused.

Yes. We Are Here.

I would love to see this thread grow, with posts from Tribers who are ready for their voices to be heard.

Have courage, friends!

We Are All Here. Together.

My Dear Raz,

Thank you. We have now reached 400 members. Most of our recent arrivals have not found words to post as yet and I thought maybe a welcome and words of encouragement might ease the passage from observer to participant if any are struggling.

Be not afraid, for we are with you. What you read may comfort you and what you post may comfort others.

Bemused (who posts a lot )

Well said Bemused.

I heard a new term for the many who are apparently reading here but not posting. Many of you are still in NTM, but you feel sympathetic to the cause of MK abuse survivors, and you are disappointed and frustrated with the mission leaders' response to our call for justice and validation.

"Stealth followers".

I like it. I like it a lot. Better than "lurkers".

I like it because Jesus had "stealth followers" too. People who knew in their hearts that what He said made a lot of sense, but in their roles and lifestyles they could not speak out about it. At least not at that particular time.

To you Stealth Followers, I just want to say, I am glad you are here. I sense your support, even though we don't know who you are or where you are. Everyone who reads silently has their own reason for silence. Participation is not a requirement here. Your presence is appreciated, and so is your open heart and questioning mind.

Keep reading please. Thank you. You are loved ... and I say that openly and without reservation.

Well said! Who came up with that "lurkers" or "inspired lurkers" anyway?

I am a current member of NTM, and post on this Forum occasionally. You may have heard it said or implied that those who post on this site just want to see NTM destroyed and punishment meted out to those who have inflicted or abetted abuse. While there are those whose hurt and pain runs so deeply that they cannot yet see beyond it, the majority of the abuse survivors here only desire the truth to be revealed, and for NTM to place a higher value on revealing truth than on organizational survival.

I am in my 20th year with NTM, and have worked at NTBI-Jackson, in Panama, and with NTM Aviation in McNeal. I wholeheartedly believe in and support the goals of NTM in the context of global evangelism. I also strongly support this journey toward truth. I want to see health and healing in NTM as an organization. I also want to see health and healing in those who have been touched by abuse of any kind by NTM. This IS what God also wants.

Is this also your desire? We can't deny these events happened, and we can't deny the extensive damage that occurred in the lives of numerous children. We can only ask, "What does God want me personally to do?" I would also love to talk with any NTM members who would like to do so. Email me at paul_syson@ntm.org, or join this forum and PM me if you would rather remain anonymous for now.

Perhaps becoming active is NOT what you are feeling drawn to do -- and that is OK. I followed this Forum for almost 4 years before becoming a participant, and I believe that was the right decision at that time. But if you remain on the sidelines, please keep informed. You never know when the Coach may say, "It's time for you to be on the playing field."

Nicely put and thanks for sharing.

Re the Big Coach. Sometimes I wonder if He is blowing His big whistle and shouting "Would someone tell that player on the far wing who keeps hogging the ball, somersaulting and wearing the shirt that says S. Agnostic, to give others a chance". On the other hand He might be saying "I'm not sure exactly what that player is doing with the ball, but it certainly isn't a boring game . . ."

But you are right, the "game" is about pursuing truth, so healing can have the best chance of taking place.

And speaking of games (getting distracted for a moment), there is no Kiwi team in the World Cup of Soccer, which is about to start. Who does Bemused support? Mrs Bemused thinks Brazil.

Of course, Brazil!

Always Brazil!!