Election Day down here in New Zealand:
Now having been edumacated at the pestigous Numonohi Acardarmy, I have a working knowledge of U.S. politics and know how easy it is to understand. Essentially there are two parties, the Democrats and the Republicans, one of which wins.
We used to have a similar set up here, but we changed it to a proportional system, so now there are lots of political parties and they have to squabble over power sharing arrangements when the votes are counted. So to enlighten us all, here is a selection of what is on offer in New Zealand:
The National Party: Trust us to not stuff up the economy and the rich will trickle down their wealth to the poor, if they feel like it, ha ha.
The Labour Party: We is the red party for a good reason, call us Robin Hood, we take from the rich and give to the poor, after we have deducted generous expenses.
New Zealand First Party: Not heard of for three years, but pops up just before each election and appeals to the elderly voters by telling them they can ride on busses free and that the country is being invaded by immigrants who don't look like whatever a Kiwi looks like.
The Internet Party (and you will find this one amazing): Headed by a Kim Dot Com (which is not his real name of course), who is a very large German with a lot of money that he made from interesting deals on the Internet relating to downloading music he didn't make and that the FBI would like him extradited to the U.S. for. Of course being German, he can't actually be on the ballot.
The Greens: The mung bean munching lefties who want everyone to stop driving cars, but drive their own cars to tell others that they shouldn't.
The Conservative Party: Caters for the religious vote, but doesn't mention it to loudly as the last party that did that had a bit of a problem when their leader ended up in jail for what this site is all about.
So there we go. A quick guide to Kiwi politics. It would be so much easier if we had just the good ole Democrats and Republicans
Login
Register
FAQ
Search
