MK forum

Yes, MK for 18 years.

Yes, clearly the naïveté - more like incompetent oversight - was not excusable. The oversight incompetence is why I have supported the abolition of NTM boarding schools along with the fact that it would be a key step in communicating to MKs that they/we are equally valued. While I never had to live in a dorm, many of my closest friends (from just about any mission organization you can think of) did from early elementary through high school. I witnessed the struggles of many, most of whom were not abused by dorm parents, but still separated from family for most of their young lives.

I sensed, but had limited direct experience with the "cult" leadership of NTM EC. I had a lot of direct experience with Philippine FC without any such impression. They weren't infallible and didn't pretend to be so.

It takes seriously selective reading to suggest that I have defended all the handling of this episode by FC.

Pagod, your voice is welcome here. You are an MK and my desire is that this be a safe place for all MKs.

All of us MK/TCKs have been deeply affected by the unique challenges and sacrifices imposed on us, not by our own choosing.

Our parents "laid it all on the altar" ... and that included their own children.

Big, big sigh ....

Pagod,

Please forgive me. I must be really stupid to believe that is a child molester were to be marched down to a police station with a confession in hand that he would be incarcerated. Please forgive me for being out in la la land when I believe that even if there was nothing that the police would do, that the entire Aritao Campus would be watching his every move. Please forgive my stupidity for thinking that If he had been brought to the police, and even if they did nothing but extradite him, that there would be a legal file on him in the hands of some law enforcement agency instead of the paper shredding CPC. Please forgive me if I am so ignorant about thinking that if someone knows that a child has been abused they should call the authorities instead of giving the pervert a free pass. I must live in an idealistic fairy-tale.

Are you out of your tree?

There are blinders on you and it appears that the loyalty to the Philippine FC is personal. Friends? Family? Maybe a parent?Although I applaud your loyalty, right is right, and wrong is wrong. Please take the blinders off.

Let's be careful to allow any dissenting views freedom and any opinion permissible.

I trust any and all comments made by Raz and we need to keep this forum open. Some of us are desperate for others to 'talk" and start to comment. Far too many have been silent.

For me personally, I apologize if I my response to you Pagod, was confrontational.

On the same vein, Pagod, please know that some of us have been long involved with the aftermath of abuse and it is important that the anger and disillusionment be respected as well.

I personally will ever be grateful for Tow Mater, his wisdom, his humor, his righteous anger, his legal experience and his tenacity.

No shooting our own soldiers here.

Interested,

I'm with you 100%. I understand the anger and disillusionment completely. It is totally appropriate and justified. I share it too, but hope it can be redeemed for good. That's where I seem to differ. I may be pollyanna, but I'm hoping I might be able to figure that out.

I also agree that I do not have insight into how everything has been handled over the past almost 2 decades. It is clear that EC is struggling through it and has not done a good job.

I am very open to opinions other than mine. That's kind of the point of these forums to some extent. My only reason for posting at all is to provide a view that has some connected experience and to let those who read but don't post know that I support them. I'm open to being wrong because I wasn't a part of any FC deliberations nor do I have even 2nd hand knowledge of those deliberations. I do have direct personal experience with the victims (that doesn't mean I know their abuse stories in detail, just who they are and that it, in fact, happened), the FC leadership, and the country that was my home for most of the first 18+ years of my life. My view can be disregarded by any without personal offense on my part. While I witnessed the abuse and was affected by being in proximity, I and my family were spared from the direct effects for reasons unknown to me.

I agree that the tone of the last few days of this thread has come to the point that others who might speak will not - no matter what their views - for fear of getting smacked around. That's not going to accomplish anything useful.

You are right to trust Raz's views and comments. She was much closer to this to this whole mess than me and certainly had more direct insight and memory of what occurred and how it was handled.

Haven't posted for a while but still read the blog every week. I have been wondering and have some questions: What will the abused mks do if the lawsuits do not bring the results they want? What will you abused mks do if you don't get what you want? Is there a criteria for you that if you see certain things happen you will have closure and be able to move on? Has any abused mk tried to prosecute sex offender directly? If so what happened? If not why not? Just some things I've been wondering about lately in light of some bible study. Mary the mother of Jesus was willing to bear the shame of being labeled an immoral girl even though she was a virtuous girl. She left her reputation to God. I'm just concerned that if these lawsuits go nowhere and it takes a long, long time with the investigations and people don't co operate etc well what if nothing much really happens. How long does one continue to seek justice? I don't know. I believe especially after having some counseling that every person is different and we all have different time frames for how we process and deal with grief, anger, negative emotions and problems associated with that. I do hope that you all are finding some healing and making progress regardless of what happens with NTM.

Pagod,
My sincere apologies. You are correct. This is a place for venting, healing, and dissenting views, crying, and support. I stand steadfast on my views add you do yours. I have made my position known as you have yours. I will restrain myself from smacking people around with dissenting views.

I will take a leave of absence from this forum for a while. Your input is valued even if some points contradict what I believe to be right.

Thanks for that courageous post, Mahal Ko. Best wishes to you and yours, always.

In 1993-2003 I was actively working in the healthcare consulting field and regularly worked with a guy that I often talked with about my relationship with Christ, the Bible, etc. He had some problems with what he decided were conflicts in the Gospels. He said the authors seem to differ completely about facts!

This guy had a friend who made the harrowing expedition to Mt Everest in 1996 where 8 people died. One day he came storming in after flying back from an onsite location. He just finished reading Into Thin Air. He threw the book on my desk and said “This is the 4th book I’ve read about this expedition and you’d never know the authors were even talking about the same exact expedition! Geez!" All authors agreed 8 people died but other than that fact their stories varied.

Ahh! Exactly! Later I compared his comments about the 1996 Mt Everest Expedition with the 4 Gospels.

I see similarities regarding stories of atrocities committed under the NTM umbrella.

Just maybe this will help us as we listen to each other on this blog. I once was told that no two children grow up in the same home. They each have their own grid to process life; one may be a firstborn, therefore treated differently by loving parents who are new to everything than a second born is treated.

Mahalko may be facing the effects of abuse completely differently than Pagod is. Perhaps one abused victim isolates while another self destructs or rages. One thing we can all agree on, Abuse is evil!

Anyone who has been closely affected or closely in relationship with a victim despises any abuse or any cover up and rage is appropriate. Often spontaneous. To watch a young life struggle to survive and just maybe never thrive, can wretch a heart like nothing else. For me personally, I see red when I think there is even a hint of a cover up or some smarmy sickening sweet little platitude that is supposed to heal the abused. Christian-ese can be the worst! Recovery can take a lifetime and no Bible verse fixes the damage to the soul. Healthy victims that I know, who have worked for years on their healing walk with a limp for the rest of their lives.

I, for one, wish NTM dissolves. Today would be fine with me. God doesn’t need NTM to complete his work. NTM has a dirty reputation. NTM has covered up sin for so long it is time to go away!

Poogymom said “This has to do with God’s reputation, and His movement in this day and hour.” Huh?

Isaiah 48:11
New Living Translation (NLT)

11 I will rescue you for my sake—
yes, for my own sake!
I will not let my reputation be tarnished,
and I will not share my glory with idols!