MK forum

Go figure, huh? I think it´s a matter of perspective and while you will find positive comments about Via throughout this forum, we´ve all needed a place to dump for awhile. That was a pretty bad year, though, I was certain I´d been through the worst year of my life (little did I know how bad life could REALLY get). Just bear with everyone a bit. Things aren´t black and white, ESPECIALLY in the areas of emotions, and pent up ones at that.

So sad to read all these posts. The sexual abuse and all the other abuse is so sickening makes me want to punch a hole in the wall. This is going to be a long, painful process but we must see it through to the bitter end. Why? For all of you victims, and because God wants us to deal with it. Are you angry at God for not stopping the abuse? Do you feel abandoned by God? I'm so sorry for all that has happened. I'm praying for you daily. It makes me so mad to think that these creeps are running around free as a bird, but God knows who they are and where they are, they cannot escape Him. If they are not believers when they die they will be under Gods judgment; alone; in torment; forever burning but never being consumed in the lake of fire for eternity. A very sobering thought. Still working thru if they are believers having to walk the streets of gold with them for eternity. I know God sees all sin as the same but sexual sin like this is detestable. I think I would be more OK with a murderer than a child molester, I don't know, what a sick world. We so desperately need Jesus our Savior.http://fandaeagles.com/forums/posting.php?mode=reply&f=20&t=356&sid=f7dc29f7f5cf5a7452f769893138edf8#

In regards to what "Still Healing" said about not wanting to attend Via Reunions, I have almost avoided being around Via people too. My thing is that I just never knew where I stood with people? Did they know about the abuse? Do they think I made it up? Did they love Steve and Sonia also? Were they abused also? Are they mad the Armours had to leave Via? Do they think I also exaggerated? Do they think I divided my extended family? Do they wonder what's the big deal about this abuse anyway? I could go on and on. Can you see how emotionally exhausting it was for me whenever I was around Via people. People who knew about it and were on my side, were safe people and I was ok with being around them. But with everyone else, I just never knew. And as much as I wanted to put up a tough exterior and act like I could handle it, I wasn't that tough.

I know EXACTLY what you mean, I didn´t realize that someone from inside could feel that way too. Except that I felt that way whenever I met up with any NTMer, pasted that "sorriso amarelo no rosto, dava risada seca" and got out of there asap. The first I started meeting up with Via people again was on facebook and I had ambiguous feelings. And did not regret 1`it much that I wasn´t anywhere near the via reunion. What would I say, just pretend my senior year didn´t happen? Bring it up and be confronted by embarrassed silence? How would I be able to talk around the elephant? I can´t IMAGINE how it must have felt for an insider. I feel for you.

@ sun & @ survivor:

I hope you both know now that part of the insidious nature of it all was to keep each of us isolated emotionally from one another and so prevent any deeper healing from occurring. Yet, isn't that the nature of sin and its effects on those who taste its effects or are abused by other sinful creatures?

I'm so thankful that both of you have said what you said . . .keep the faith and continue on to complete the race, as Paul would say. There are a whole host of witnesses that not only saw the sin committed against you, but also will stand with you, either in this life or the next, to see that godly justice is done!

I'm so proud to have known both of you and call you friends . . . .

I had mixed feelings too, but not for the same reasons. I wanted desperately to get together with other Via people, but I was afraid it wouldn't be as meaningful as I hoped it would be. I've learned something about myself over the years though- that I tend to downplay stuff- to not get my hopes set too high, to tell myself I'm not missing out, to say "I don't care." Truth is, I needed to feel validated for my feelings about Via, but I wasn't sure that would happen in a "Reunion" setting. I didn't want to sit around and just reminisce. I wanted to talk to someone who "got it" about how hard life had been for me--the issues that (now) we are all finding we hold in common! So, I let those relationships sort of drift into "nothingness" into Nirvana. (My classmates will get this reference.) And as long as I didn't dwell on it too much, I was okay. (Oh, and for the record, although you, my classmates, voted me most-likely-to-get-married-first, I was the last one in the bunch to tie the knot!)

But the truth is, I've missed you. It's really refreshing to hear you all speak your hearts. I think there were glimpses of that, even while at Via- late night talks or testimonies at Retreat. But now, I feel like, as Mangotree said, I'm seeing each of you in different light. I have a new found respect for those that have posted, whether I've guessed who they are, or whether I have more "sleuthing" to do! And yes, I'm blessed to know you and call you friends!

Wow, today must be the day for tears. I have cried reading over these posts, finding new "posters" expressing their feelings, and talking about the hurts and the good memories. I was hesitant to even get involved with all this for the reasons I mentioned in a previous post, but I'm so glad I did.

@ survivor: We're glad you're here!!