MK forum

Discuss anything MK here
It is currently Mon Nov 11, 2019 9:59 pm

All times are UTC - 5 hours




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 186 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ... 19  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 2:57 am 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 10:28 pm
Posts: 51
Even in the 90's there was tremendous pressure put on parents who worked at Tambo to put all of their kids, including the really young ones, into the dorms. My parents went along after a lot of pressure to do so, then pulled us out after the first semester for a variety of reasons, including Mr. Hine being kicked off the field and other concerns over the treatment of kids in the dorms. I was teased for being pulled out of the dorms by the then principal and dorm parent (and later director of the school) in front of the other high school kids repeatedly.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 3:58 pm 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Wed Jun 23, 2010 11:27 pm
Posts: 5136
Thanks, Tambo MK, for confirming this memory I had, which I'd mentioned a while back in one of my posts.
Back in the '90s there was a (short?) period of time when families who actually lived on the Tambo school base were pressured to put their children in a dorm, so that all the children in the school would feel the equal deprivation of being separated from their own parents.
This concept appalled me, even back in those days when I myself was deeply enmeshed in NTM groupthink.
This has to be the epitome of the notion that MKs are just the property of the mission, to be shuttled about with no consideration for their emotional and spiritual wellbeing.
I am so repulsed by this that I can't even put into adequate words, how damaging I think this policy was. Parents who submitted to this atrocity and forced their own children live in someone else's home must deeply regret the profound ways in which this had to have affected their precious little ones.
I weep for our ignorance and passive compliance to such a destructive system.
God forgive us.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:56 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 10:28 pm
Posts: 51
I never felt disconnected from the other kids, and eventually I did end up back in the dorm when my parents were transferred to a different location - however, the dorm parents at that point were amazing. My friends enjoyed feeling like they were getting away from the school when they hung out at my family's house, which was good.

The only person who made fun of me for no longer being in the dorm was that one individual, who was the principal and dorm parent at that time. He used to make fun of me for a lot of things in front of the other students and got in trouble/called out while I was a student for abusive discipline procedures. He would beat kids from middle school through high school with a wooden paddle 15-20 full force swats, leaving them bruised all up and down the back of their legs, until the field committee was informed about it. There is quite a list of inappropriate ways he ran the school, interacted with other staff, and most significantly, treated, interacted with and dealt with students.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Thu Dec 23, 2010 2:45 am 
Offline
User avatar

Joined: Fri Jun 25, 2010 7:04 pm
Posts: 3718
Thank you for coming back, Tambo MK.
We believe we need to keep our voices loud and ongoing.
There are more stories from Tambo that need to be told and come under investigation.
Yours is corroborated by staff we know.
Suggestions/questions/requests/ were silenced or ignored back then.
It is not too late to deal with this now.
HOW???
We are not giving up.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Tue Dec 28, 2010 10:05 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Sep 14, 2010 11:04 am
Posts: 24
There was plenty of physical abuse at Tambo. My brother has only recently told me of a dorm parent who took great pleasure if "spanking" the little boys (I call it beating). If they so much as whispered during church or devotions the were made to stand before all the other boys, drop their pants, bend over and grab their ankles. This man then gave them 20 "wacks" with a big wooden paddle with holes drilled in it. Each hit was spaced out so as to achieve maximum pain. One of my brother's friends told me when I asked him about it that as 6 and 7 year olds they had major bruising and used to compare their bruises. They could have written a scientific paper on the stages of bruising. I cried when I heard this, how could I not have known when I was in a dorm right across the patio. My little brother and his friends were being beaten for every little thing and never saying a word. They lived in fear of doing something to be beaten for. How could we have kept so much of what happened to us and how we felt to ourselves. My father would have had a fit if he had known, but boarding school creates distance, physically and emotionally, between family members and no one ever told our parents. The man who did this thinks he did nothing wrong. Today he writes christian books on godly dating and other subjects. Makes me want to vomit. One day he will face God's judgement for all the little children he hurt. He was so totally opposite to Christ's example of loving the children.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 8:33 am 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 10:28 pm
Posts: 51
I remember in the early 90's that middle school boys would compare their black and blue' all up and down the back of their upper legs from the paddling. Absolutely child abuse.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 2:01 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Sep 27, 2010 4:14 pm
Posts: 54
It just infuriates me when I read posts like NTM child's about the horrible child abuse in Tambo. Only a very warped, cruel person would use a paddle with holes in it to torture little children, and humiliate them by beating them with their pants down. 20 whacks is way over the top!!! And---for minor offenses--whispering in church etc. Even a major offense doesn't call for that kind of "discipline."
Whoever this person was, I'm sure had the blessing of NTM and the Bolivian field committee! What a disgrace for a mission organization to treat it's youngest and most vulnerable in such a hateful, destructive manner!! Yes, they will, indeed be accountable to God---and should be accountable to the Mk's.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 2:58 pm 
Offline

Joined: Mon Oct 18, 2010 10:28 pm
Posts: 51
Actually, the Bolivian field committee was notified that that kind of abuse was happening in the name of discipline in the early 90's by one of the teachers. They were pretty shocked - I don't think they knew the full extent, that it had been going for years by different men there, only that the then principal was the one doing it, and required a discipline policy to be drawn up. I think at that point paddling was capped at five swats, but I'm not sure. At the same time, I wonder how shocked they were by it in that they made the guy director of the school a year or so later. This was the same guy who originally tried to let R Hines stay at the school and wasn't going to inform the staff what happened, only that he had had a sin issue and needed to move into a house instead of being a dorm parent and would no longer be the director, but would still be a teacher.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Fri Dec 31, 2010 6:12 pm 
Offline

Joined: Tue Sep 14, 2010 11:04 am
Posts: 24
The abuse I was talking about happened in the late 60's and into the 70's. The field committee had to know, after all, the Director of Tambo at that time was on the field committee as well as one other staff member. The problem was that anyone who didn't bow down and worship at these men's feet was tagged as having attitude problems, "you have a problem with authority", etc. etc. Ever since then, my antennae go crazy when I hear a person in a church, mission, or christian organization talking about their authority over other believers. I truly believe that if they were walking as God would have them walk, in humility and love, members of the body would recognize their walk with God and respect them and they wouldn't have to preach their own authority.


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
 Post subject: Re: Tambo MKs
PostPosted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 12:07 pm 
Offline

Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2011 11:26 am
Posts: 12
We are a curious tribe, aren’t we? There is a special bond between MKs that can’t be duplicated. Tambo had a lasting impact on all of us and the memories are compelling some 30 years later… Maybe it is the paradox of the disruptive and stabilizing effect of boarding school that took many from their families yet provided a strong and reliable community, a family of strangers – other MKs. Most of us returned to our “home” countries one by one and felt the impact of our uprooting as isolated individuals. Recently, many of us were joyfully connected again on facebook – all our fellow warriors – MKs who made it through all the boarding school times. For a while, we all seemed to remember the fun and shared experiences that only we could understand.
Tambo, like many of the mission schools, had a distinct subculture created by the isolation and the cross cultural influence of coming from one country and living in another. We were isolated by the values of our missionary families and by our presence in a foreign country. At the same time, we were influenced by that foreign country and the international and ecumenical character of Tambo. I know now that many abuses took place. At the time, I didn’t realize what it was called. It was all I knew. When we came back to the US, I was very angry about the way my parents were treated and was surprised that the feelings of anger popped up again at the prospect of a Tambo Reunion this past summer. My mom and dad always did what they felt was the right thing to do, regardless of what the field committee or others in leadership felt was right. As you can imagine, this often made it difficult for them, but I am forever grateful that they taught me to question the answers and stand firm for what is right, even against powerful forces such as those with the control/power. My parents taught us that right is right, and sometimes leaders/teachers/adults are wrong. It isn’t fair, but it is a part of life, so think for yourself and do the right thing. And be willing/prepared to handle the consequences for standing up for what is right, no matter what they may be. I am grateful for this lesson – it has served me well.
As for the physical, emotional, and spiritual abuses, I saw them and experienced them. I think they made me angry at injustices and probably had a big role in shaping who I am. I hate bullies and bullying of any type at any level and work to eradicate it whenever I see it. Especially the type of bullying that hurts someone’s soul and who they are. There was a lot of that going on in Tambo. If you look at those bright, hopeful first grade faces in the Kantuta and then see them just a few years later, you notice a difference. Some of the light went out and some sadness came in. So much of who we are is still that little person we were – even as adults, we have to see in each other that little person that is still an important part of us.
Overall, I am grateful for the experiences because they helped to make me strong in so many ways. I came back to the US extremely glad to be unknown and different. I think I rather embraced this. I could be whoever and whatever I wanted. No one knew me or much about me. I could be whoever I wanted to be. I loved college for that reason too. I was free of all of those who “knew” me and their preconceived ideas about me and my family. It was wonderful to be whoever I wanted to be. It was great to be at a place where people saw you with fresh eyes and allowed/helped you to become. It is amazing how positive words from professors and others build you up. I am also grateful that my parents were there too. I am sure it would have been awful without their presence and support during the huge transition to the US.
Scholastically, we were well trained at Tambo. I did not have much trouble with college or other schooling in the US. Emotionally/spiritually -- many times we were not well served. It seems that many staff worked hard to destroy the spirits of the children who were separated from their parents. That will always make me sad for that little child still inside each of us. It is my hope that from the experiences we all had, we can use them in a positive way. What was bad, we can use for good. The experiences, good and bad, helped to make us who we are and we are a pretty amazing group of individuals, if I do say so myself.  Each MK is a gift, a special person made in God’s image. May God continue to bless you all.
"There are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our encouragement, who will need our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give."
— Leo Buscaglia


Top
 Profile  
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 186 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 ... 19  Next

All times are UTC - 5 hours


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  
cron
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group