Amended GRACE Report on NTM Fanda–Amended Edition

1. On and between June 24th and June 26th, the GRACE team will be meeting with over 15 individuals who were adults during the days of Fanda and who were in some way related to the operation and/or oversight of the school.   Some of these adults have been quite defensive of how NTM operated Fanda, while others have been extremely critical.  As you can guess, these meetings will be critically important and most likely very difficult.  We covet your prayers for these days of meetings.  Please pray that God will give us the wisdom to search and find truth as we learn from, confront, and challenge those who are in attendance. These meetings will provide GRACE with the final pieces of the puzzle needed in order to prepare our final report and recommendations.
2. The GRACE team will meet on June 26th for the purpose of collecting and finalizing our primary ideas and recommendations for the preparation of the final report.
3. GRACE will spend the month of July drafting the final report and recommendations.
4. GRACE will deliver the final report and recommendations to the MK’s and NTM on a date yet to be determined in August.
5. Sometime after the delivery date, the GRACE team will be in communication with the MK’s for the purpose of answering any questions or concerns that any of you may raise regarding the contents of the report and/or the recommendations.
6. Sometime after the delivery date, the GRACE team will meet in person with the NTM Executive Committee to review the report and to begin working out the implementation of our recommendations.

April 10 Update – letter from Grace

Feb 23 UPDATE

VA went very well. About 15 former MKs were there to share their stories in individual interviews with the Grace team. Grace asked intelligent questions and displayed appropriate outrage about what happened at Fanda and the resulting NTM coverup. This was the first experience for some of us in realizing that by speaking up we are part of the solution – not the problem. To speak up is strength and bravery. Thank you to Grace for their hearts and time and expertise.

Grace will speak to many more MKs and Ms (missionaries and former missionaries) in the next month and they are shooting for final recommendations by end of spring/early summer.

Please email Grace if you still want your voice heard. We are so encouraged. Love.

——————-

Happy 2010 everyone. This is going to be an amazing year.

People have been asking for an update so I thought I’d let everyone know that things are happening! Those of us MKs who want to meet with Grace will be traveling to Virginia most likely the weekend of Feb 19. After that the phone interviews will commence and we should be seeing the final letter of findings by late spring/early summer at the latest.

So many letters are pouring in from MKs who have had an experience of abuse at other NTM schools around the world but because it is now out in the open are finding support/seeking counseling and starting to face those things we might have tried to never think about but that affect us nonetheless.

If anyone wants me to attend their interview/phone interview with Grace I am available. Please let me know at eagles@peregrinebynature.com.

Love to all,

Kari

I hope this letter finds you well.  My name is Boz Tchividjian and I am the Executive Director of a non-profit organization called Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment (hereinafter, GRACE).  During the past months, GRACE has been working with former students (hereinafter, MKs) who attended the Fanda School in Senegal and New Tribes Mission (hereinafter, NTM). The purpose of our work is to independently and comprehensively investigate and review numerous allegations of physical, sexual, emotional, and spiritual abuse that was perpetrated upon MKs while attending Fanda.    Though you may very well find this to be a very difficult and painful subject, I ask that you make every effort to read this letter in its entirety.   Please understand, GRACE is not a representative of NTM but is working independently with all parties involved.

GRACE is an organization that was formed in 2004 by a group of prosecutors, counselors, and pastors who have spent many years advocating for the protection and safety of children.   It is absolutely necessary for the Christian community to understand the evils and complexities of child abuse and how it must be confronted at all cost.   Children have too often been ignored by the Church, which has contributed to the widespread epidemic of abuse within the Christian community.    The purpose of GRACE is to 1) train and equip the Christian community on how to minimize opportunities for abuse within its own environment, and 2) train and equip the Christian community on how to properly respond to child abuse disclosures.   We believe that the failure to address either of these issues is simply wrong and adds further devastation to the physical, emotional, and spiritual life of a child, the effects of which can last a lifetime.   Furthermore, when the Christian community fails to take immediate and substantive corrective action upon learning of such abuse, it is in direct contradiction to the commands of Christ when he said, Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these (Mark 10: 14).    You can learn more about GRACE at our website, www.netgrace.org.

A few months ago, GRACE was approached by the executive committee at NTM and informed about its failures to adequately address the numerous allegations of abuse related to the Fanda School.  We were asked to consider whether we would review the entire matter and make certain recommendations to NTM to ensure that it finally and correctly demonstrates authentic repentance for this dark chapter in the lives of so many individuals.   After much thought and prayer, the GRACE board informed NTM that we would conduct a comprehensive review and investigation into the entire Fanda matter.   A non-negotiable condition to our engagement was that our work be wholly independent from NTM and that our final report and recommendations be made simultaneously to the MKs and NTM.   NTM agreed to this condition while again expressing its desire and need to demonstrate repentance.

GRACE has spent the past two months reviewing hundreds of pages of documentation we requested and received from NTM related to Fanda.  We have also spent a significant amount of time reading the many blog entries and substantive comments that have been posted on www.fandaeagles.com.   This time of review has allowed GRACE to become significantly familiar and educated about the various horrors which transpired at Fanda and the repeated failure of NTM to take immediate responsive action upon learning of this abuse.    Though we have benefited greatly from this extensive document review, GRACE believes it is imperative that we hear from each of you.   It is time for us to listen to those whose lives were forever changed while living in Africa as children of missionaries.    It is through your experiences that GRACE intends to effectuate substantive change at NTM so that no other child of a missionary will ever have to walk through a similar nightmare.   Just as important, it is through your experiences that we expect to make very specific and substantial recommendations on how NTM can demonstrate authentic repentance to each of you.    We plead for your assistance.

GRACE would like to meet with each of you to hear of your experiences at Fanda, and how those experiences have impacted your life.   Our hope is that during the coming months, we can arrange for you to travel to our headquarters in Lynchburg, Virginia to meet with a GRACE team.    We are happy for you to bring someone with you to this meeting if it will make you more comfortable.    Ideally, we would like to arrange such visits on or about the same time so that you all will have the opportunity to fellowship with each other.  We have arranged that all expenses related to such a visit will be underwritten by NTM.    If you are unable to meet with us in person, we would very much like for you to take some time and prepare a detailed written statement for our review.   It is imperative to understand that everything you communicate to GRACE (whether in person or in writing) will be held in the strictest confidence and will not be disclosed to anyone outside of GRACE, including but not limited to, NTM.

We believe the most practical way to move forward at this point is for each of you to complete the attached confidential survey.   This will greatly assist GRACE in understanding some basic information about each of you as it relates to your experiences at Fanda.   Upon receipt of the completed survey, GRACE can begin to move forward and contact each of you individually to coordinate your visit to Lynchburg, or the preparation of your written statement.   It is our hope that we can hear back from each of you via the completed survey no later than Friday, December 18, 2009.  This will provide us with the opportunity to begin contacting each of you after the Christmas holidays.

Although we pray you will be able to help us in this process, we also realize that your experiences are deeply personal and that you may not want to discuss or in any way re-visit your experiences. Please know that we will completely understand if you choose not to participate in the survey or the in-person interviews. Your physical and emotional well-being must come first.

In closing, I want to thank you for taking the time to read this letter.  For many of you, any mention of Fanda or New Tribes Mission understandably brings up various difficult and uncomfortable emotions along with scores of very painful memories.     Many of you may be extremely reluctant to engage in a process that in many cases is twenty years overdue.   All of these responses are extremely reasonable and justified.    GRACE simply asks that you give us the opportunity to do what has never been done to this day, the complete, comprehensive, and independent investigation and review of all abuse matters related to the Fanda School.    The purpose of our work is to demonstrate love, respect and honor for all those children who were so neglected and hurt while innocently attending a missionary school so many years ago.   Each of you is owed nothing less than complete accountability and repentance from New Tribes Mission for its failures to let the little children come unto me.

We would greatly appreciate if you could return the completed questionnaire within the next ten days.  This will assist us in moving forward with this process in an expeditious but thorough manner.

There are a number of individuals who attended the Fanda School that GRACE has not been able to locate.    If you know of any individual who should have received this letter but did not, please encourage them to contact us at the above listed email address.   We very much want to establish contact with everyone who attended Fanda School.

We look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

Basyle Tchividjian

Basyle J. Tchividjian, Esq.

Executive Director, GRACE

Hi all Fanda ex-MKs,

Those of us who are seeking closure in this matter would love if you were all willing to speak with GRACE and tell them what you were or were not aware of what was going on on the field. The more insight we have on this matter the more thorough their investigation can be. I personally would be so grateful for your participation.

If NTM lawyers or anyone else “representing NTM” contacts you I would encourage you to refer them to GRACE. We know from speaking to GRACE that they hold the position that the cover up that happened at Fanda is Biblically wrong. GRACE does not represent NTM in any way but has agreed to mediate for both parties as an objective third party.

GRACE would love the opportunity to talk with everyone who attended Fanda from 1985 until it closed in 1997. Please feel free to contact them directly at info@netgrace.org.

I hope everyone takes this opportunity to give your thoughts and share your perspective. I understand some of you wont have abuse claims…GRACE wants to hear from you too. Everyone’s input will be helpful in uncovering how this abuse could have happened.

I’d love to talk to anyone who wants to contact me.

eagles@peregrinebynature.com

In a nutshell GRACE’s position on what occurred at Fanda and other schools around the world and in the church is this: GRACE hates sin and coverups. GRACE says God abhors sin and the non-response of the church is sin, and sin will always be revealed in His time. The priest and the levite who passed the wounded man on the road to Jericho were almost surely on their way to do “good religious works” and were probably on their way to the synagogue. But the samaritan was a friend and a neighbor, as we are called to be, and God does not excuse injustices committed in the name of the “greater good”. In fact He abhors it. Doing good works is not an excuse. The church (mission) is culpable spiritually and criminally for covering up.

Last weekend Bonnie and I also flew to Philadelphia to meet with Diane Langberg of GRACE. GRACE is an organization that we feel we can trust to be impartial and to advocate for us for resolution and justice. We want to encourage you to communicate with GRACE your stories and your desires for justice. We have given GRACE the go-ahead to investigate our stories and read all the documentation that NTM sent them on Fanda. Your voices now are going to be instrumental in giving the big picture of what Fanda was like and what really went on.

Please feel free to email me at any time for information. I am also more than happy to sit in on any MK interview if it would be a help to anyone. Let us know if there is anything else we can do. We are excited and encouraged to see resolution and justice to these matters.

Kari

eagles@peregrinebynature.com

moderator note: initials are chosen randomly and do not reflect actual names

When A,  B and I were in the little dorm at Fanda in the same room,  B was touched by the dorm dad. In that year  A told her mom that  B and I were doing stuff to each others boobs and asked her mom if that was OK. ( I only found out about this next bit a few weeks ago). Her mom went to the Fanda FC and told them about it and said that this was not normal developmental behavior and she thought that either  B or I were being sexually abused (The mother of  A had been abused as a child).

Instead of investigating abuse they interrogated  A and asked her what else B and I had done together, she said “nothing”. Then they called mine and B’s parents to Fanda, telling them what A said we had done but nothing about possible abuse. They sat B myself and our parents and all the FC men in a room and I don’t remember exactly what they said but they said that we had done something REALLY BAD. They humiliated us and told us to tell them what we had done together. We just cried. This went on for a few days while they told us how sinful these things were (they never actually told us what we had been accused of doing) .

Our parents went home after those first few days then (my mom only found out about this the other day) it got worse. They brought the dorm parents into it ( the dorm dad was B’s abuser) and they told us quite descriptively what we could have done which was nothing that  A ever told them we did and told us it was wrong and we need to confess it to them. We cried a lot. We were forbidden to have any contact with each other. We were questioned together and apart.

I think the dorm parents may have initiated the continued investigation. I can’t understand why they were even involved. When we still confessed to nothing they got us individually in a room with a FC members wife and the dorm mom who hated us because I think she may have had some idea of what her husband was doing. This had gone on for around a week all up by now. We finally both admitted to doing stuff with each others boobs and insisted that there was NOTHING else.
After we told them this they dropped it and it was never brought up again. We always thought that A had told them a bunch of lies and I only found out that she didn’t A FEW WEEKS AGO when I finally found the courage to actually talk about it to her. I also thought that her mom must have told the FC because she thought we were dirty rotten kids. My parents thought that the bit that they were involved in was an overreaction.

All of this destroyed my relationship with my mom. She didn’t stand up for me. And I thought that she believed A’s lies ( which turned out not to be lies) and supported the FC. I told her after this that I didn’t want her to hug me anymore and I decided I was on my own in the world. I hated and didn’t trust any adult. I feel SO sorry for my Mom. She had no idea what actually went on! I love her SO MUCH now and have a very good relationship with her, but this change in our relationship only started to happen after I turned 18.

So… instead of investigating if there could have been any abuse they ATTACKED the abused in front of the abuser. Us children were abused by the FC. I would go as far as to say that it was sexual abuse by them at times. This happened in the 1990′s.

]]> http://fandaeagles.com/2009/08/we-were-asked-to-post-this-anonymously/feed/ 10 http://fandaeagles.com/2009/08/fanda-alumni/ http://fandaeagles.com/2009/08/fanda-alumni/#comments Fri, 14 Aug 2009 19:40:13 +0000 Kari http://fandaeagles.com/?p=572 Hello Former Fanda MKs,

We are in the process of forming a committee to respond to NTM’s choice of third party investigative organization. We are not yet certain that we can agree to mediate through GRACE but in the event that we decide we can we want to be prepared.

If you would like to join the committee please email us. My primary goal is for the protection of the MKs during the investigative process. Email me to find out more or just to let me know your thoughts. This is all of our decision and the committee is being formed for all of our protection, since NTM chose the third party without any input from any of us.

Kari

eagles@peregrinebynature.com

In June 1988, just prior to our June 18 scheduled return from furlough to Senegal, we had several phone conversations with Frank S, field chairman in Senegal. We taped one of our phone calls during which we resigned from the field. Then, with urgings from the Executive Committee and a meeting with them in Jackson Michigan, they assured us that they would work with the Senegal committee and the field committee would hear our hearts and be sympathetic with the direction God was leading us in not sending our girls away to boarding school. They encouraged us to return to the field.

In July 1988 we returned to Senegal.   We were met with disdain and accusations from our field committee. We were mocked, ridiculed and scorned. The confrontational meetings sometimes lasted up to 5 hours at a time.   We were told that the blood of the Budiks was on our hands if we didn’t return to Chobo. We were told that we were making our children into gods.  At one meeting a FC leader said to John, “We are four, you are one, God can’t lead you by yourself. “   At that point John told them “Well, if that is your doctrine, then I don’t see how I can submit to that kind of leadership.” That enraged one of the leaders (Bob A) so much he got within inches of John’s face and raged at John that he was in sin.
Diane was told in these meetings that her desire to be with her children was a hindrance. John was gifted for tribal work. She was told repeatedly that she was too emotional regarding the changes in her daughters. Did you notice in the above paragraph “you are one”?  Did the Spirit not lead women? Diane wasn’t even considered to be involved with the direction of our family nor to be the godly mature woman that she is.

We wrote a letter to the FC on November 19, 1988 telling them we were leaving the field unless we saw a change in the leadership. It is almost comical to re-read old letters now and see that because of the authoritarian style of the FC they decided on November 29 to dismiss us from the field. They simply had to be in control.

Can you imagine that when we called the Executive Committee to report Dave B. molesting our daughter, we were told we were ruining his ministry?  We told them “he has no ministry.”
Can you imagine when we told the FC that Kari had been molested, the field leader wrote us a letter that said “at least it wasn’t intercourse. If you had submitted to our leadership and put your girls back in the dorm and returned to the tribe, God would have worked it out.” They did not consider what had happened to be abuse.

This past April (2009) a Senegal leader (Ron A) told Kari that even though he knows now all that happened he would have dismissed us from the field right away instead of giving us 6 months to live at Fanda with our girls.

There are many guilty in this whole picture. We are guilty as well. We wanted to blame our training; we wanted to blame the teaching of our leaders; we wanted to blame our upbringing; we wanted to blame NTM.  There is definitely blame and responsibility for all those entities. BUT we knew Christ. We had the indwelling Holy Spirit. We had God moving very intentionally in our lives. We chose to operate out of our fear.  Oh we appeared in control and disguised our fear. But we feared NTM. We feared criticism. We feared what ”so-and-so”  would do or think of us.  We feared losing our support and our ministry.  We were influenced by our fear of stepping out of bounds.

In those dark places of despair and facing our own life strategies for surviving in the broken world of NTM Senegal, we were overcome by our own stubborn sinfulness. We abandoned our girls to this culture at Fanda. WE DID IT!  We are much more sinful than we ever faced.  We sinned greatly against our daughters. We sinned against God. We quenched the Holy Spirit’s gentle leading in our lives because of our own self-protection. We are without excuse.

Is God big enough for all of this? We KNOW HIM now. Yes He is grace and mercy.   He is also ruthless with sin. Our daughters can see through any phoniness in us. They are experts at it. They can spot hypocrisy a mile away.  The past 20 years have been a journey  towards authentic living.  No pretending we are more spiritual than we are. No pretending we are wiser than we are.

Someone who was very influential in our lives and our path towards freedom told us that we can learn to freely own our sin. After all, His remedy is there for our sin.  There’s no need to hide it.  We are getting there. To recognize how sinful we really are in our self-living, we get to run to the only remedy – Christ alone.  We used to think we got saved at the cross and then moved “heaven-ward” in our daily walk with Christ. Now we want to live at the cross.

Those of you who never faced sexual abuse in your family are possibly in shock over the stories. You will feel the horror of this as you read the stories. You will feel the sadness. A sweet innocent life was damaged as she was repeatedly sexually molested from age 8 to age 10. She was so compliant and such a sweet child. She had no voice.

You may feel it for a few days and it might bother you.  You might even think about it during the middle of the night.

We are one family that experienced this travesty. We lived it every day. We spent many nights awake for years asking God to help us. We cried out in desperation. We didn’t get to avoid thinking about the terrible effects.

Our daughter had no idea anyone else had been molested. Self-hate, confusion, illegitimate shame, thoughts of suicide were ever present.  We were the parents who sent a sweet innocent 8 year old daughter to Fanda.  She was habitually and methodically sexually abused for 2 years by a dorm dad.