I think some of you would be surprised to know that though we only gave the link to this site to 70 MKs from Fanda, those 70 passed it on and more than 1000 people from NTM have visited the site in the two days it was up. Most of the anonymous commenters are not MK’s, but are former and current NTM missionaries who are righteously and rightfully indignant about being lied to by leadership about the type of environment they were placing their child into.
I’m not sure if you have children, but imagine this scenario if you will. You place your very young child into a boarding school where the child care provider (let’s call him Uncle D) has no qualifications or training to work with children. You are not informed that he also has at least one current claim of sexual abuse against him by a child. Uncle D will become your child’s surrogate father, working with your child day and night, tucking your child into bed at night. As he is unsupervised he has the ability to stay by their bed as long as he desires.
One child claims Uncle D was sexually inappropriate with her. This is while your child is sleeping a few beds over from this girl. The supervisor at the school does decide to talk with Uncle D about the abuse claim, but after Uncle D claims innocence and because the school has a shortage of workers the case is dropped, without talking to the child, or you, the child’s parent, or any of the children’s parents.
Now imagine one year later, another child who is no longer at the school claims she was molested by this same man, never having heard about the girl before her, thinking she was the only one bad enough to have brought this on herself. She tells her father who believes her, and he contacts the school. School officials believe her dad is making the story up to vindicate his reasons for not returning to his village. Her dad doesn’t give up and keeps petitioning until finally the school agrees to have a talk with Uncle D.
He admits he molested several of the girls at the school, but as he is already leaving the school due to personal issues the matter is considered solved and nothing is done about it. The matter is dropped since Uncle D is already gone, no parents are told anything about what happened including the parents of the girls he admits to molesting and in fact when parents try to get information they are admonished by the school officials to stop gossiping.
If your child had been in that school living with that child care provider, wouldn’t you want to be informed so you could talk to your child to find out if they were also abused and if so to get them some help?
In fact, wouldn’t you claim being informed was your right? Wouldn’t you be indignant as a parent that the school did not bring this matter to your attention? Let alone attempt to discipline the abusive childcare provider? Of course you would! In fact it IS your right to have that information relayed to you. Concealment of it by school officials is a crime.
Not one person here can claim that as a parent they would say to the school, well everyone makes mistakes. No biggie. No, they very well might forgive but for the sake of those abused children’s self esteem and for the protection of all of the next generation of kids who might grow up under the protection of those school officials they would want the school disciplined for their criminal negligence. This is healthy and right.
I am telling this from the perspective of a parent whose child may or may not have been molested. The school is culpable and should be.
In another post, I’ll tell you what it felt like to be one of the little girls who told and was called a liar by school officials and even after the abuse was admitted to was not called by the school and vindicated, was not mourned with, and was actually ignored and made to feel like she was the problem for nearly ten years until it became apparent that the problem was much too big to conceal any longer.
Then she received a form letter.